In Twenty Four Hours
by Aki and Tenshi
Summary: James makes a bet with Lily that he can win her heart in twenty four hours on the pretense that if he doesn't he will never ask her out again, but the results are something neither of them expected. Maurader era, seventh year. Lily&James obviously.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

"Hey Evans," called the voice of the one and only James Potter to a red-headed beauty. 'Evans' did not stop, turn, or inquire what the one and only James Potter wanted. She just kept walking with her friends into the Great Hall.

"Wow Prongs. You have reached a new level of rejection. Being totally ignored," chuckled a charcoal black- haired, handsome boy.

"Shut up, Padfoot," replied James half-heartedly, but obviously annoyed by his best friend. Padfoot just smirked to himself. They and another boy paused outside of the Great Hall.

"I think you're going about it the wrong way, James," said Remus, bringing himself into the conversation as he trailed behind his friends.

"Really?" noted James irritably, stopping and leaning against the corridor wall.

"I think Remus is right," jested Sirius, "I mean most guys would have given up by now."

"Shut up"

"No, James what you are doing wrong is that you always ask her out in front of people and make a big show about it, like she is a prize. You should take her aside and be serious…"

"Yeah," cut in Sirius, "Be me."

Remus glared at him for his over used pun then continued, "As **I **was saying, you have to be serious about it. Don't joke around, be romantic."

"Since when did you become a womanizer?"

"I'm not," replied Remus shortly, "I am just saying what I think would work, or would have worked, it is too late now."

"Then why are you telling me now!?" asked James exasperatedly.

Remus shrugged.

James sighed. "Why does she hate me so much?" he said dejectedly.

Remus and Sirius glanced at each other, concerned that their friend was so upset of this when he was usually so light hearted.

"It's not you, Prongs, mate," commented Sirius reassuringly. "You're a good guy really."

"It's just the way you act around Lily. You're not being yourself, you're being-,"

"A complete idiot," Sirius said with a playful smirk, cutting off Remus, who glared at him, not appreciating his friend's antics.

"Look," said Remus as they entered the Great Hall, "She probably doesn't even hate you… I mean, if she got a chance to know you…"

"Yeah," agreed Sirius, catching onto Mooney's game of cheering up James even if they didn't exactly believe everything they were saying. "I'm sure that if you had only twenty four hours you could make her fall head of heels for you, that_ is_ if you could actually get her within ten feet of you…"

Sirius trailed off as he realized James was no longer with them, but was standing stock still about ten paces behind Sirius and Remus. His eyes had glazed over in way that the other recognized easily as meaning he was conjuring up some plot in his devilish mind.

"Oy, earth to Potter." Sirius snapped his fingers a few time in front of his best friend's blank face.

James, however, seemed not to notice Sirius at all. "Twenty-four hours," he muttered to himself.

"What?"

Again James ignored him as he brushed by Sirius.

"What's he up to?" questioned Remus as Sirius returned to his side.

"Probably something stupid, if I know him right," Sirius replied as they stared after James who had stalked half way down the Gryffindor table and was now standing behind a particular red-haired, green-eyed girl.

"Evans, I want to ask you something."

"The answer's no," she replied curtly, not even turning to look at the boy standing behind where she was sitting.

"Okay, just hear me out, okay?"

Lily Evans sighed in frustrated resignation. She turned on the bench to glare up James Potter. "Fine."

"You know how I ask you out all the time?... That's got to get pretty annoying."

"Indefinitely so," she added with a small, amused curl of her lips.

"Right, anyway," said James, attempting to ignore her last comment. "I have a proposition for you."

"What is it, Potter?" Lily asked, annoyed.

"Okay, give me one day, twenty-four hours, to show you that I'm not a, how do you put it-?"

"A bigheaded git."

"Yeah that. And if in that one day you fall for me- which I think will happen- then we take our relationship from there."

"And if I don't, because I don't think I will, then what?" said Lily.

"Then I'll never ask you out again," answered James. Remus and Sirius didn't believe their ears. Lily cocked her head to the side, considering him, wanting to know if he was for real.

"Never?" she asked after a moment.

James nodded in reply.

"Even the rather imaginative proposals of marriage?"

"Even the rather imaginative proposals of marriage," agreed James.

Lily was lost in thought for a moment. On the one hand would have to spend an entire day with the insufferable Potter, but on the other hand he would stop bothering her for the remainder of the school year. It was a tempting offer, she had to admit… and of all things Potter was, he was true to his word. He wouldn't break this promise.

"When?"

Sirius stared agape from down the table. He obviously hadn't expected Lily to accept James' ludicrous offer.

James smiled, obviously he had. "How about the Hogsmeade trip next weekend?"

"You got it," replied Lily after a second moment of consideration.

"So it's a deal then?" asked James, extending his hand, as though making sure she had said what he thought she had said.

Lily rolled her emerald green eyes. "Deal," she replied, shaking James hand, trying to ignore how well her small delicate hand fit so well into James' larger, warm hands that were slightly calloused from intense Quidditch training.

James gave a final, satisfied nod to his crush before walking back to his to utterly amazed friends.

"Are you guys gonna' eat?" questioned James sitting down at the table, "I, for one, am starving."

"What just happened?" asked a still shocked Sirius to Remus.

"I think," said Remus, sitting slowly down on the bench, "That James just got Lily to agree to go on a date with him."

"But…" Sirius just shook his head, finally sitting down with his friends.

Down the Gryffindor table sat a thin girl with tan skin and short, light brown hair was staring, an eyebrow raised, at her friend across the table.

"What?" snapped Lily, feeling her friend's, Kaila, eyes on her.

"Nothing," Kaila replied, "Unless we are going to talk about what just happened here."

"Nothing happened here."

"Oh, if by nothing you mean you agreeing to go out with James Potter, who, if I remember correctly, you swore many times to never go on a date with."

"Look," said Lily, looked up her a friend, "I just said yes so he'd stop harassing me and I could spend my last year at Hogwarts in peace. Nothing else. Okay?"

"Okay," said Kaila, but it didn't sound as if she agreed, then she added under her breath, "If you say so…"

"What is that supposed to mean!?"

"Nothing…"

"Okay, we really need to get you a dictionary."


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

Sirius sat rubbing his brow in a tired manner in an armchair in front of the fireplace. "I do not believe this... I _do not_ believe this."

"Really, Sirius, you need to get over it," said Remus, annoyed.

"Come on, Moony, you don't actually think James' little plan is actually going to work, do you?"

Moony scratched his chin with the end of his quill. "Well, you never know…"

"What's going on?" interrupted a round-faced seventeen year old, joining his friends' by the fireplace.

"Lily agreed to go on a date with James," Sirius answered gloomily to Peter.

Peter glanced between Remus' and Sirius' faces. "That's good, isn't it?" he asked tentatively. Remus quickly explained the extenuating circumstances.

"What's wrong with Prongs getting the chance to impress Lily?" asked Peter.

Sirius sighed exasperatedly. "Lily despises James, do you really think he will be able to change her mind in just one day. He'll make a fool of himself."

"What makes that different then any other day?" Remus quipped. Even though Lupin was a little antsy when it came to practical jokes, Sirius had to hand it to him, he was quick with the sarcasm.

"But seriously," added Sirius so solemnly he didn't make a 'Serious-Sirius' joke. "It'll break his heart."

Remus ran a hand through his sandy hair. "I don't think there is anything we can do about that."

-

About the same time an agitated Lily and a smug Kaila entered their dormitory.

"What's up?" asked Miranda, shorter, plum girl with tangles of blonde hair asked, seeing their faces.

"Lily's going on a date with James Potter," replied Kaila before Lily could open her mouth. Miranda nearly dropped the books she was holding.

"It's not what it sounds like," growled Lily plopping angrily onto her bed.

"What happened?" Miranda asked in a hush to Kaila who replied in whispers as Lily glared at them.

"Looks like somebody's in _love_," taunted Miranda drawling out the last word.

Lily graced her with a rude reply to crude to reproduce here.

"Someone's defensive," commented Kaila, sitting down next to Lily and putting an arm around her shoulders. "Don't like revealing your hidden feelings for a certain Mr. James Potter."

"I don't have hidden feelings. I don't have any feelings for Potter!" burst Lily jumping up from the bed.

"Then why all the anger?" asked Miranda with a smirk.

"Because- because he is just so- so aggravating!"

"And you feel that way, because of your feelings for him…" said Kaila with a smirk."I mean look at me," said Kaila, cutting off Lily's protest. "I don't have any feelings for Potter. Sure I laugh at a few of his jokes and cheer at the Quidditch matches, but otherwise, I don't love, I don't hate him. It's what I call apathy and my apathetic self is not going on a date with Potter while your supposedly hating-self is…" Kaila smirked.

"Well," said Lily, putting her hands on her hips, "I bet you can't say the same for Black, now can you?"

Kaila's eyes narrowed and a pillow came flying at Lily's face. She barely dodged it.

-

As the week progressed closer and closer to the fateful day of the date, Lily slowly filled with dread. Maybe she shouldn't have been so quick to accept the offer. Lily didn't know which was worse Kaila's and Miranda's knowing glances at each other whenever a topic remotely connected with Potter was brought up or the way James had taken to ogling at her at mealtimes, during class, and across the common room with a strange glazed look over his eyes. Lily was fairly sure that she didn't want to know what he was thinking about. The only good thing was that he wasn't talking to her.

Maybe the strangest thing was the Lily usually looked forward Friday night, the sweet release from the overwhelming stress of a seventh-years' homework. Having a whole two days to relax. However it always seemed that Friday would drag in forever as torture. This Friday was different, it zoomed right past, following the suit of the rest of the week. She knew it was connected to the growing dismay in the pit of her stomach connected to it being her last night of freedom before her day with …. James Potter.

She found herself staring at her open wardrobe. Half of her wondering what to wear the other half of her wondering why she cared.

"The light blue turtle neck sweater looks smashing on you," commented Kaila as she entered the dorm.

Lily threw her a nasty glare.

"I mean, it is supposed to be a bit nippy tomorrow, it'll keep you warm," retorted Kaila with a smirk.

-

James was sitting by the fireplace, starting into the dieing flames, mentally reviewing his plans for the next day.

"Prongs… are you coming to bed?" asked Sirius, in his pajamas, asked the lone habitant of the common room, coming down from the steps leading to the dormitories.

"I'll be up in a bit…"

"Whatcha' doing?" asked Sirius, sitting down next to his friend.

"Just thinking," James replied.

"About Evans?"

"Yeah, her. I just want everything to be perfect tomorrow."

Sirius nodded and said nothing.

"I really like her," continued James, staring blankly into the fireplace. "I'm not just joking around."

"I know," replied Sirius.

"I know _you_ know, Padfoot," said James, glancing at his friend. "I don't think she does," he added worriedly.

"Did you ever really give the opportunity to know that? I mean, you harass her endlessly."

"'Cause I know she'll rise to the occasion!" said James with a smirk. "She is too much fun _not_ to taunt."

"I don't think she sees it in the same way."

"How observant of you," commented James sarcastically.

"Look, mate, get some sleep."

"I'll be up in a bit, I promise." James sighed worriedly, "I really hope tomorrow is perfect."

Sirius wanted to say something along the lines for James not to give his hopes up, but decided it didn't sound very encouraging.

"Good luck," he muttered to James ruffling the young man's hair was he walked by on his own way to bed.

James glared at his back, he hated when Sirius did that…

* * *

Aki- First I would like to thank each and every one of my reviewers of the first chapter for their positive and encouraging feedback. Second, if you don't like Kaila or Miranda, they won't have a big part in the story for the most part, but they will pop up again. Peter won't have a big part either because he is not much fun so he is in their more for obligation that anything else. 

Next chapter- the date begins…


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

She had been having a very pleasant dream about a cozy summer day when she found herself being awoken by an annoying poking on her arm and the whispers of "Evans, wake up."

She sat up suddenly, shocked and only slightly terrified, just making out the outline of a large, looming figure over her bed.

"WH-?"

She was cut off from her scream by a firm hand slapping over her mouth. "Shh… the others are still sleeping…" The hand left her face.

"Potter?" she asked in a skeptical, irritated whisper as her eyes adjusted to the dark a bit and he stepped back into the moonlight coming threw the window. He nodded.

"How did you get up here?" she said urgently, standing and approaching him. "I know those steps won't let boys walk up."

"I have my ways," James replied with his characteristic smirk. To Lily, the thought of his ability was very disconcerting.

"What do you want?" she asked, not humored.

"To go on our date," he replied as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"It's only-," Lily looked at her wrist before remembering she had taken her watch off the night previous before she went to sleep.

"Five-twenty," James supplied.

"Five-twenty in the bloody morning," she complained, voice cracking a bit as she whispered agitatedly.

"If you recall correctly, you promised me one whole day, twenty-four hours, for me to prove myself to you. You're lucky that I gave the first five and a half precious hours for sleep."

"And you're lucky," swore Lily menacingly, "That I haven't cursed your head off yet."

"Now, now that's not very nice."

Lily growled and James decided to tone down the teasing until she was a bit less tired.

"Look, I'm going to go down to common room so you can dress. If you're not down in ten minutes I'll assume you went back to sleep and I'm coming back up… okay?"

"Fine," mumbled Lily in response. She was sure that Potter would have no greater thrill then sneaking into the girl's dormitory twice in a single morning.

-

James paced uncomfortablely back and forth in front of the empty fireplace. He checked his watch for the tenth time in thirty seconds. He glanced up the steps to the girl's dorms.

He pulled the Marauder's Map from his robe pocket. He glanced over it quickly. All the teachers were asleep in their respective living quarters, even Filch. Mrs. Norris appeared to be sleeping on a window sill three floors up. Only the ghosts were wandering around and unless they ran into Peeves, none would alert their presence to the faculty. It seemed that no one expected any self respecting students to be wandering around the castle at five thirty on a weekend, or maybe none of the teachers cared enough to be up at this time in the morning to check.

A throat was cleared behind him and he quickly stuffed the map back into his pocket. Lily was standing on the bottom of the steps that led up to her dorm. She was wearing a lovely blue sweater that clung to her figure quiet nicely under her heavy cloak and the expression of a convict resigned to a dreadful fate. That wasn't a particularly hopefully sign, but James chose to ignore it.

"So, Potter, you got me up this early, what are we doing?"

"First of all, Lily," he said emphasizing her first name, "It's James, at least for today."

"Fine, James." For some reason she found it hard to put as much malice into that word then she could 'Potter.' "Now for my question. Where are we going?"

"Trust me."

Lily tsked, amused at the thought.

"Trust me," James repeated narrowing his eyes. "It's something I can only show you so early in the morning, and it will be worth it…"

Surprising her, James approached her, took her by the hand, and dragged her toward the portrait hole.

As soon as they were outside the dorm Lily pulled her hand out of his. James tried not to act as if he cared.

"Where are we going?" she asked, for what she felt was the umpteenth time.

"Just come on…" James said, leading the way threw the maze of school corridors.

They walked in silence, whether for the apprehension of being caught or the mere fact they had nothing to say, for several minutes, side by side, Lily just a half a step behind her counterpart.

"I swear, if we get caught and I get detention for being out after hours…" she let the threat hang open ended between them.

"Technically we're not out after hours, we're out before hours," James reasoned lightly.

"We're out before hours," Lily mumbled to herself mockingly. Usually she would not revert to such childish means, but, hey, you try being woken before five-thirty in the morning on the weekend.

"We're going outside?" asked Lily tentatively as they arrived in the entrance hall a matter of minutes later.

"Yes," answered James simply, knowing he was irritating her with his short, vague responses. "Coming?" he asked as he opened the front door just a crack and held it for her.

She brushed past him onto the grounds. "Where to now?" she questioned, crossing her arms around her chest against the morning chill.

"Lumos," James muttered, making his wand light up. He took hold of her sleeve, remembering she didn't like him holding her hand, and led her slowly down to the edge of the lake where the old beech tree stood. They sat down in the nooks between the old roots.

Lily opened her mouth to ask what they hell they were doing there, but James cut her to the chase.

"Just wait," he said gently, staring straight ahead through the dip between where two mountains' bases met.

She anxiously for a few moments as the sky around them slowly became less dark. "It's nearly dawn," she commented offhand.

"Exactly," James said quietly.

Lily gasped at what she saw and she leaned back against the tree. The sun had just begun peaking between the very gap they were staring at in the mountains, filling the world with hazy orange light, illuminating the distance green tree tops and the peaks glistening with snow. As it rose higher, the wispy clouds in the sky were painted various shades of unnatural pinks and purples.

"My god, it's beautiful."

"Mmhhmm…"

Lily turned her had to James when she realized he was looking at her rather that the sunrise.

"You're not watching this?" she said, motioning toward the heavenly light show with one hand.

"I've seen it a few times before."

Lily looked at him strangely.

"What?!"

"Nothing," said Lily turning back to the rising sun. "I just never took you for an early riser."

"Well," said James, considering, "It's not so much rising early then staying up very, very late."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Setting up one of your little pranks I assume."

It was true in more than one case, but James couldn't help but be offended. "Did it ever occur to you that I might have stayed up helping a friend?" He couldn't mention it, but a serious of late night scavenges with Remus on the full moon flashed through his mind, although not the most selfless acts he had to admit, but they had aided him, secretly of course, back to the castle after he retransformed to his human state.

"Oh," said Lily softly. James heard the skepticism in her tone, but there was something else too, very possibly a bit of guilt that she never pegged him as one to stay up and care for his friends before.

The sat there until the sun had fully risen above the mountains and was well on its way into the morning sky.

Both James and Lily stood silently and brushed themselves off.

"To breakfast?" James inquired.

"We'll be the only ones there this early."

"So?"

Lily suppressed the urge to roll her eyes. "Fine."

"May I escort you," James asked, offering his crooked arm with a small bow.

"Stop trying to be charming, James," Lily said, brushing by James with disdain, and very poorly suppressed grin.

**

* * *

**

**Aki-** Hope you liked it, I did. Next chapter is a very awkward breakfast.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

"So…" James commented, trailing off as he looked out the window on the far wall.

"So," Lily repeated curtly.

It had been like this for the last ten minutes, but it felt more like thirty.

"Supposed to be a bit chilly today," James said, not believing he was dropping so low as to small talk about the weather.

"This is England," Lily retorted, "It's always chilly."

"True," admitted James, waving the fork in his hand as he did so.

Silence fell between them again.

Lily buttered a piece of toast, took a bit, and chewed very slowly, hoping to find an excuse not to talk. James picked up his goblet and took a sip. How many seconds did that delay… three, maybe?

After a few more agonizing moments the doors of the Great Hall opened with a disgraceful bang, catching both James' and Lily's attention. And in came one of the strangest group of squabbling, rowdy seventh year Gryffindors: Sirius and Kaila looking much too active for this time in the morning followed by a yawning Miranda and an obviously agitated Remus.

"Where's Peter?" asked James instinctively, not surprised at the least at their sudden appearance, actually thankful for a break in the dull conversation.

"Still asleep, that great lump," replied Sirius.

"But apparently _some_ of us aren't allowed to sleep," commented Remus in frustration. Sirius blatantly ignored him.

Lily looked to her own two friends. "What strange company you keep."

"Could say they same for you," replied Kaila, glancing at James, with a small smirk.

"We ran into each other at the portrait hole," Sirius explained.

"Apparently all of us were wondering where you two had both disappeared to before the rest of us had woken up," Kaila finished.

"All of us, just you two. Pa-ta-toe, Pu-ta-toe…" Remus muttered under his breath, but to Miranda's consensus as the four sat down next to their friends.

Again he was ignored and Sirius asked in dead earnestness, "Making out in the broom cupboard?"

Lily blushed in spit of herself, but James just brushed the comment off. "I'm not you, Padfoot."

"But really, where were you? If you had plans much early than it is now, I'm sure I would have heard Lily complain about it," said Kaila.

Lily scowled at her friend.

"It's true!" she defended indignantly. "Now answer the question!"

"I," started James, answering for a mad Lily, "Woke Lily up before half past five. I wanted her to see the sun rise."

"Oh," said Kaila with romantic admiration. Sirius sniggered into his goblet. Remus elbowed him in the side.

"Wait a minute," Miranda said, speaking up for the first time. "_You _woke her up? How? You weren't in the –"

"You know how to get in the girl's dorm?!" said Miranda and Sirius in unison.

All eyes were on James.

"Umm," he started nervously, "Yeah."

Miranda's mouth was agape in both shock and horror. Sirius was half way between awe and indignant.

First he thumped James on the shoulder affectionately. "Way to go, Prongs!" Then after a second of consideration he thumped James on the shoulder even harder. "Now why didn't you tell me how?!" he asked indignantly. "I'm your best mate! We're supposed to share these types of things."

Remus rolled his eyes behind Sirius' back.

"Sorry, Padfoot, mate, but I don't trust you with this type of information."

"Thank God," said Miranda loudly. Sirius looked at her with questioning raised eyebrows.

"No offense," she said with a roll of her eyes.

"None taken," he replied, waving it off.

Lily suppressed a giggle. She leaned back on her elbow, observing the playful, light-hearted group. The ease at which they all got along was amazing.

James caught her eye. He grinned at her. He, as well as her, were staying silent as the other four bickered and teased.

"It's extraordinary, isn't it," he whispered across the table to her while the others were too preoccupied fighting over the last of the pumpkin juice in the pitcher even though there was a full one just a few paces away down the table.

"And all of us were never even really that close…" she added.

James nodded in agreement as they watched the front of Sirius's robes getting drenched with the rest of the said pumpkin juice, much to the other three's pleasure.

"Except first year, remember?" he added.

Lily shook her head. "That was so long ago."

"Come on, think. We were all little scared first years that hung out in a clump for protection or something, the whole lot of us…"

"I remember a bit. It was so …simple back then."

"Or at least it seemed it. Life is never simple."

Lily gave the boy across from her a strange look. "That's almost philosophical, Potter."

"You mean James."

"That's almost philosophical, _James_," she corrected. He was not ever going to let that go, was he?

"Yeah," he agreed. They locked eyes for a precious long moment. James always loved her eyes, but it was the first time she noticed his, so covertly hidden behind his small, round glasses. She noted how she loved the mix of brown and green as she titled her head to the side.

"Ah, look as these lovebirds…" commented Miranda.

Lily was jolted from her seat, her face heating up at the statement. "What?! No!"

"Come on, you were so busy staring into each others eyes you didn't even notice the fire."

"What fire?" questioned James, concerned and confused.

"Exactly," concluded Kaila with a knowing look.

"Well, why don't we leave these," Sirius paused, "Lovebirds alone."

The other three nodded, and got up to move down the table.

"Oh, get out of here," said James, throwing a bit of toast as Sirius, who just chuckled.

"By the way, there wasn't any fire," Remus said.

"Oh, and Lils, I love that sweater," added Kaila with a wink.

Lily shook her head in frustration. James was, however, humored.

"You know," he said, "Your friends are really great."

"Yeah," agreed the red-head, looking up from where she had hid her face in her hands. "They are… even when they are antagonizing me."

"What do they have to antagonize _you_ about?" James asked with a half-grin.

She sighed exasperatedly. "Everything."

"Such as…?"

"My hair-"

"Your hair is fine."

"My grades-"

"They are excruciatingly perfect-"

"My temper-"

"Have to agree with them there."

"…You…"

"What about me?" asked James, surprised but interested.

"Well, you know," answered Lily, trying to avoid the question without realizing she was.

"No, I don't. Why do they tease you about me…?"

Lily stared at her plate, for the third time that morning, blushing. "You know," she said, glancing up at him. "About you having this thing for me and they always like to say…"

"To say…" James prodded.

"To say that I have a thing for you too," she said swiftly.

James grin got wider along with Lily's discomfort.

"And you don't?" he questioned.

"No!" she replied both too fast and too loudly.

"Now you hurt me Evans," commented James, clutching his heart.

Lily made a face at James for his offhand manner.

James stuck his tongue out at her in turn. Lily couldn't help but laugh out loud at his childish antics. James chuckled with her. The Great Hall was now holding a larger portion of the school populace. The students moved in and out around the two but, they didn't notice.

Kaila, Miranda, Sirius and Remus were sitting down the table, staring shamelessly at the unaware Lily and James.

"Brilliant," whispered Sirius with a smile. "And a little surprising."

"Surprising how?" asked Kaila, across from him, "That Potter hasn't made a fool of himself yet…"

"Yeah, that, and… it looks like Evans is really falling for him."

"And that's surprising?" questioned Kaila.

"Yeah," said both Remus and Siruis. Kaila turned to Mirdanda who was nodding in agreement.

"Even you think so?"

Miranda shrugged. "I know we always teased her about it, but I never thought…." She looked and James and Lily sitting together down the table.

Kaila looked with disbelief between the group of friends before asking, "So none of you thought it would work out before, but me?"

* * *

Aki- I hope this chapter was more amusing the last. I don't know I liked putting Kaila in the spot light so much. As I proofread it I thought she was maybe a little marysueish. Any, if you don't like her she wouldn't be in here a lot… 


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

'Okay, Prongs, you're doing good. You've made her laugh and she was all amazed at the sunrise bit so just reach out and take her hand. It's not that hard. It's right there. Just reach out a few inches to the left… Come on James, what's the worst that can happen, she pull her hand away…yes, yes that could happen and it would be devastating… no it wouldn't, come on, boy, you can do it…"

No matter how much will power James focus on his own arm, wishing it to move and grab Lily's hand as she walked next to him on the way to Hogsmeade village, it stubbornly continued to absently swing next to him, rather goofily he might add. In fact, the more he tried to make his swinging arms looks less stupid the more stupid they did appear. To him anyway…

"So, James, where are we going?"

James jumped slightly as Lily's voice brought him out of his thoughts. He hoped she hadn't noticed, but her smirk told otherwise.

"Um, well, I thought we could just wander. You know, see the sights."

"We've been coming to this village for like four years. We've seen all the sights before."

"So?" asked James, not seeing her point.

Lily rolled her eyes. "Whatever, just lead the way."

They walked slowly, too slowly for Lily's taste, for she was one to pick a destination to go to it, not wander aimlessly. The town was bustling around them with blushing teenage couples, gossiping girls, the roaring laugh of boys, a few street vendors calling out their prices, and the bells on the shop doors ringing as they were repeatedly opened and closed.

"So, Lily. Are you going home for Christmas? I know you usually do," said James, trying to strike up a neutral conversation.

Lily gave a little shrug of her slim shoulders, "Not this year."

"Why not?" asked James curiously.

"Because it's my last year here, I don't want to miss anything," she explained.

"I can understand that."

"Plus, if I go home for Christmas I'll spend all break having to bear with my sister's wedding plans," added Lily with disdain.

"Ah, not you're idea of a fun holiday?"

Lily let out one derisive and agreeing laugh, "Exactly."

"Do you and your sister not get along?" James asked Lily with both interest and sincerity in his tone.

"Nope," replied Lily in an almost tired way. "Not anymore."

"Do you mind if I ask why?"

Lily sighed and sat down on an empty wooden bench outside of a shop. James sat next to her.  
"We were friends when we were little. We really were. But then we grew up. She started her new school and made new friends and then I got my letter to come here, to Hogwarts."

"So you grew apart?" clarified James.

Lily sighed again remorsefully. "I wish it was that simple."

James raised his eyebrows in interest and bit of confusion, but said nothing.

"My sister, Petunia, isn't fond of my whole magic thing."

"Why?" asked James.

"She doesn't think being a witch is, how did she so tactfully put it, natural," answered Lily with a touch of sarcasm.

"That's stupid. It's worse then stupid, it's completely loony!" exclaimed James. He saw how this topic was upsetting Lily, but he really did think it was stupid.

"_You_ would think so," she muttered under her breath.

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?" asked James, eyes narrowing slightly.

"You wouldn't understand."

"Try me."

"Look at yourself, James," Lily said adamantly. "Look at where you come from. You're pureblood! You grew up in the wizarding world. All your friends and family have always been and will always be magical. It's so very different for someone like me."

"I still don't get it."

"You, people like you, look at Muggles and their 'loony' technology and wonder at how they get by without magic, at the best."

"That's not-" James began to protest but Lily cut him off.

"It _is_ true. You look at Muggles and can't understand their lives, but Muggles look at wizards and witches and think the same thing. They don't understand…"

"I guess I never…" James didn't know what to say. He had never thought about it before.

"No," said Lily, downcast, "You didn't. You're not the only one. My parents try to understand, they really do, but they _never_ will be able to get it. My sister doesn't even try. She thinks I'm strange, abnormal,… a freak."

"You're not a freak."

Lily tisked under her breath before replied angrily, "Try telling her that. All I am is a splotch on her perfect, spotless, completely normal life. I swear the only reason she is even letting me in the wedding is because she knows people will talk if she doesn't."

"I'm so sorry you feel that way," said James sympathetically, placing his hand over Lily's in a comforting way without thinking.

"Don't pity me. I've gotten used to it by now. I've become more and more of an outsider in my own family every year I've come to this school. Being a witch among muggles does that. The irony is that being a muggleborn among wizards does exactly the same thing. I don't fit in anywhere."

"Lily…"

"Don't say it's not true. Whether people realize they are doing it or not, being muggleborn in this world means you never get to be the same as everyone else." Lily lowered her gaze to her lap, ashamed, possibly for sharing her deepest feelings with her swore enemy or for having such lack of faith in the world.

James opened his mouth to say something. To protest it wasn't true or to give some word of comfort, but he couldn't. He couldn't because he realized that he had no say in this matter. Lily was right, he didn't know what it was like. He had a completely comfortable easy life. Sure he could claim that blood didn't matter to him and get all offended when people said 'mudblood' but it didn't really affect him. In the end he was still pureblood, fit with his family and fit with this world, and had no clue how the other side lived.

"God," said Lily into the silence, putting a hand over her reddening face, "Sorry you had to listen to my whining…"

"No, no," James protested, "I- I like listening to you."

Lily lowered her hand from her face and observed James with a strange expression on her face.

"Plus," added James, "I had never thought about that before… I'm –I'm sorry."

Lily shook her head, "You don't have to be. It's not your fault. At least you try…"

"Well, I'm still sorry. I'm sorry that you feel that way and I never realized it before. For you or any other muggleborns…"

"You don't have to be sorry," said Lily as she sighed exasperatedly, partly hating herself for spilling all of that out. She hadn't even told Kaila or her mother that she felt this way. "But if you insist on it," she continued with a small smile, "Then thanks."

"No problem," answered James with a reassuring grin. Their eyes locked for a moment before Lily turned away, surprised by the intensity of the stare. James sighed inwardly. He always thought he had known Lily, but here he just learned he hadn't known her half as well as he had thought…

Lily shivered.

"Cold?"

She nodded in reply.

"Why don't we go to the Three Broomsticks from some butterbeer. That always warms me up."

"Okay," agreed Lily, her talkativeness having disappeared.

As the stood from the bench and made their ways through the crowd, down the street to the pub James realized that when he had took Lily's hand as she comforted her on the bench he had never let go. He gripped her hand a little tighter and he swore he small her eyes flash down between them to where the hands where, but she didn't pull away.

**

* * *

**

**Aki- **It's a bit shorter then the other chapters so far, but what do you think?


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

"James, can I ask you a question?"

James looked up from his drink. The two of them were sitting at a small table, stuffed in the corner by the fireplace, in the Three Broomsticks. They had been sitting in the bustling pub for a good ten minutes, warming their fingers, nursing butterbeers, and waiting for someone to talk again.

"Shoot," he said, taking a sip of his drink.

She took a moment of contemplation as though she was considering not asking her question or wondering how to word it.

"Why me?"

"Huh?"

Lily rung her hands nervously in her lap. "Why," she repeated, avoiding James' eyes, "Did you choose me?"

"Choose you?" said James in a tone of voice that begged for clarification.

"Why did you choose me when there are tons of other girls in this school who would love to go out with you? Why me?"

James shrugged. "You can't help who you like."

"Oh," she stated, a touch of disappointment in her voice. On second thought, James realized that answer was kind of lame, scratch that, very lame.

"So it didn't have to do with …me?" she asked tentatively.

"Of course it did. It had everything to do with you…"

"Like what?" asked Lily skeptically.

"Like…I don't know. You're different," answered James pathetically.

"How?" asked Lily, slightly amused to see the usually smooth James Potter scrambling like this.

"Well, for one, you never wanted to go out with me…"

Lily scoffed, "There are a lot of girls that don't want to go out with you."

"Thanks for the blow to my ego," James mumbled sarcastically.

"You're welcome," replied Lily, leaning on an elbow on the table, rather enjoying herself.

"But you are the girl who is most vocal about it," added James.

"True," agreed the red-head with a nod.

"And I liked that about you."

"Why? Do you enjoy me yelling at you in front of everyone?"

"No, but I liked that you did, because it meant you were different."

"So were back to 'different' again, are we?" asked Lily with a touch of annoyance.

"No, come on, let me explain."

"Fine…"

"See, when you were yelling at me for when I was being stupid and immature-"

"So you admit it!" Lily interrupted. James ignored her.

"- it meant that you saw me as something different as everyone else did. I just wasn't some popular Quidditch player to you. You saw me for real. And you were brave enough to stand up to me."

"Then why did you still do it, even when I told you to stop and apparently you respect that?" asked Lily, intrigued.

James shrugged and answered nonchalantly, "Well, being stupid and immature is fun."

Lily rolled her eyes, just when she thought she had finally gotten through to him…

"Okay," she said, ready to fire another question. "So you noticed me because I thought you were an idiot and told you so, but why do you like me?"

James paused in consideration, "You really don't know?"

"No," shot Lily back, suspecting that James did not have a real answer either. "Tell me."

James looked nervous. More nervous than Lily had ever seen him.

"Do you even have an answer?" she asked skeptically.

"Yes," he retorted shortly, "Yes, I actually do, its just …" He trailed off and his face red tinged red. Lily blanched, this was impossible, James Potter was embarrassed by something.

"Come on," she urged, she just had to know what he was thinking now.

"No…"

"Come on. Tell me"

"You blush a lot," he finally blurted out. Lily raised a confused eyebrow. "It's just something I noticed. When you're angry, your whole face turns as dark as your hair. When you're embarrassed the same thing happens except its a few shades lighter. But when you're uncomfortable or at a loss for words, your cheeks just barely tinge pink, like you're trying to hide it…like right now."

Lily bowed her head to hide her blushing face. After she gained a bit of her composure she looked back up at James. "That's why you like me?" she asked in a whisper.

"That and all the other little million things you do that drive me crazy," he answered is a mumble.

Lily gave him a look that said 'go on.'

"Like how I can tell when you are not paying attention in class-"

"- I always pay attention in class-"

"Because you are twirling your hair. And you hate autumn because everyone always compares your hair color to the changing leaves…"

"I do hate that," Lily agreed with disdain.

"And you don't hate Quidditch nearly as much as you pretend to."

Lily opened her mouth to protest but James silenced her with a 'tell me I'm wrong' look.

"Fine, I do enjoy watching the games, but I was never going to tell your cockiness that."

"I always knew."

"Well, I didn't want to feed your ego."

"Kinda failed, didn't we."

"Well, I can always hope your head will get smaller…" replied Lily with a smirk.

James grabbed his chest and said mockingly, "You hurt me, Evans."

Lily smiled, she couldn't help but feel light of heart when he was around this playful boy. "What else do you know about me?"

"This and that…"

"What's this, what's that?" she teased.

James sighed in thought and resignation before continuing, "You have a beautiful smile, but the reason for that is because you are not one of those people who smiles a fake smile all the time. You only smile when you are genuinely happy."

Lily nodded in agreement. "And?" she asked in anticipation.

"You hate your hair because that is the only thing people tend to notice about you. Your bright red hair. You think there is more to who you are, even just your appearance. You wished people noticed the other things, like your freckles or how green your eyes are…"

"Apparently you notice," she said quietly, hanging onto his every word.

James nodded. "I do."

"What else?" she prodded further. She wanted to know how well James really knew her, despite the fact that they have never had a civil conversation until today.

"Umm…" James wracked his brain for something more. It was important to her, he could tell by the hooked look in her eyes. She wanted more. She needed more. "Your friends are the most important thing to you, almost, if not as much, as your family. They're on the same level, but there is a slight difference. Your family you're stuck with, that's why it hurts when it doesn't work. That's what you told me outside just today. But friends you choose. With them there is a certain level of loyalty, honesty, trust… But your friends don't know you as well as they think because you don't tell them things. You don't like to talk about your problems, like with your sister, or being muggleborn or any number of other things because you want to help them but you don't want to lay your troubles on them so you keep it inside… Am I right?"

Lily nodded. "How did you know?" she asked weakly.

James looked her square in the eye and said somberly, "Because I am the exact same way."

"Really?" she asked, cocking her head to the side.

"You probably look at me and think I have a perfect life, but I don't."

"You never show it," commented Lily. "You are always laughing and fooling around."

"Yeah, but that's to help them. I know all the troubles Sirius, and Remus, and Peter are going through. With family and school and girls. But I don't say what's wrong with my life, not unless they figure something is wrong and annoy me about it. In a way, helping them over their problems makes your own seem less… bad."

"Yeah… I understand exactly what you mean," Lily said, wide eyed.

"Does it surprise you then? That we have _something_ in common," joked James with small smirk, reminiscing all the times she had yelled at his face that they didn't.

"Maybe it would have…yesterday, last week. Maybe it even will tomorrow. But today, right now it surprisingly doesn't…"

"Okay," said James, understanding what she meant, but just barely. However, to Lily, it did surprise her that she wasn't surprised.

* * *

Aki- I'm hoping the first part wasn't too rambling and forced but their were several points I wanted to get across and it was a bit difficult for me. Anyway, now my other chaptered story is finished and I am on spring break so maybe (note that, maybe) I will be able to update faster. Overall, though, I liked this chapter. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Aki- **I had this chapter written last Wednesday and perfected by Thursday, but stupid would not upload... I almost broke down in sobs a few times and am really hoping this chapter was worth the emotional tormoil...

**Chapter 7**

"Okay, favorite Hogwarts moment."

"Hmm," said Lily in thought, tapping her chin with her pointer finger. "It would have to be when I walked into the Great Hall for the first time."

"Why?" asked James, sitting down on fallen log on the outskirts of Hogsmeade village where they had come after they caught a rather unhealthy lunch at the local pastry shop. The early afternoon sun had warmed up the day considerably.

Lily leaned on a large rock opposite him, "I didn't know anybody here and I knew practically nothing about the wizarding world but I looked up at the ceiling that was shrouded in stars and knew that if _that_ was what magic was, then I'd be okay… What's yours?"

"Well, I'd have to say it was the first train ride to this place," he said crossing his arms, "Because me, Sirius, Remus, and Peter all ended up in the same carriage somehow… so it was the moment I met all of my best friends even though they we didn't know it at the time."

Lily smiled, "That's nice." The tension had eased considerably between them. No longer was it awkward silences filled with sporadic conversations, but they had for the last hour or so been able to talk about everything from favorite sweets to the time that Sirius fell rather humorously into the lake that one winter. This however, turned into an unofficial question game…

"Yeah, but you know, this one is quickly climbing the charts…" he added.

Lily glanced away from his piercing gaze uneasily.

"Ah, there's that blush I was talking about…" he commented with a smirk.

"Shut up," she replied swiftly.

"Okay, my turn for a question again, right? Let's see," He got from the log and began pacing up and down on the dirt path as though contemplating something very important. Lily followed him with unamused eyes.

"Right," he said, stopping and turning to her, "One time, I think I our fifth year, you said you'd rather go out with the giant squid than me. Does that still stand?"

"Well," she thought for a moment, "That's not really a fair question is it… I mean, I don't even know the giant squid personally…"

James growled, "Just answer the question."

"I admit it, you are probably a more pleasant date then the squid…"

"Thank you… I think."

"My question. Who's your closest friend? Sirius or Remus or Peter?"

"Come on, you know the answer to that. It's Sirius." said James, leaning next to her.

"You never know. Sure, you and him seem closest in public, but that's just because you're so outgoing and stupid together, but it could always be different, you know…" she trailed off with a shrug.

"Okay, so who are you closer to, Kaila or Miranda?"

"I love both my friends equally," she professed with a nod.  
James rolled his eyes. "I didn't ask which one you loved more, I asked who you were closer to. And I know it either one or the other."

"Okay, Kaila, but just a teeny bit," replied Lily, holding up her pointer finger and thumb less then an inch apart to demonstrate.

"Right, right. I can see that…"

"My question. When…when did you first get your crush on me?" she asked, a bit apprehensive.

"I've always liked you," James replied easily.

"No, liked me, liked me," clarified Lily, feeling foolish using such preteen terms.

"I've always liked you," James repeated slowly. "Even when I first met you."

"So, it was love at first sight?" she asked nonchalantly, trying to ignore the swelling feeling in her chest.

"Something like that," he whispered.

She turned her head from him and stared over the horizon. "I'm out. Your turn."

James cleared his throat before asking, "Do you hate me?"

Lily scoffed, but still didn't look at him, "I said I'd rather go on a date with you then the squid. If I hated you the squid would be so in right now."

"I'm being serious."

Lily sighed, "I know. No, I don't hate you."

"Do you wish you did...?" he asked softly after a moment. He rested his hand lightly on her shoulder, making her turn her head to face him.

"Why would I wish that?" she asked.

"Because if you did, it won't matter what happened today and you would go on the rest of the year without having to hear another word from me…"

Lily bit her lip nervously. "Well, I have to be honest. The reason I went on a date with you was with the hope you _would_ never talk to me again…., but no, I don't wish I hated you. I don't even wish that I wished I hated you, if that makes any sense."

"It doesn't, but why?"

"Because I hate to think I would want to be a person so stubborn as not to allow someone to try and change my opinion of them."

"I can understand that… it's, um, your question…"

Lily searched her brain her a moment until something slightly wicked popped into her mind. "How many girls have you kissed?"

James looked taken back, like this was the last question in the world he expected her to ask. "What?"

"Come on," egged Lily, "I want to know….seriously."

James growled to himself before answering, "Fine, three."

"Hmm…how many of those did you make out with?" asked Lily with a small smirk.

James glared at her, "One."

"Really?" she asked with a skeptical eyebrow.

"Yes and why so distrustful?" retuned James, crossing his arms.

"Nothing," Lily shrugged, "I just expected there to be more."

"I like attention, but I'm not Sirius…"

"Oh, got me there…"

"Now that we're on this subject, answer me this… How many dates have you been on?"

"A few," she replied sharply. "I can't remember the exact count. My first was in our fourth year… none of them turned into anything though."

"Just because… or because you didn't want them to?" asked James keenly.

"What's that supposed mean?" Lily questioned defensively.

"Nothing," said James, putting up his hands in front of him in mock surrender. Maybe another day he would have pushed the issue, but not today.

Lily leaned farther onto the rock behind her. Had they just not worked out or did she not let them work out…? She knew the answer. She still carried around that little girl's cliché dream of being rescued by a prince in shining armor and riding off into the sunset and living happily ever after. The less practical part of her told her to believe in 'the one' who she would meet and just 'know' that he was the one for her, despite how fast reality tried to tear that away from her. She didn't believe in love at first sight, not like James did, but that didn't mean she didn't want to…

"Lily, are you okay?" asked James apprehensively after her unnaturally long silence.

"I'm fine," she muttered in response.

"Do you have another question?"

"Um… have I lived up to your expectations?" she asked uneasily, the question sounding insecure to her own ears, but it seemed James had an answer anyway.

"Well, let's just say I didn't know you half as well as I thought I did,

but the more I've learned about you the more I like you…"

"Oh, um…well… it's your question…." She had no other reply.

After a moment of thought he cleared his throat to get Lily's attention, then asked, "Do you regret going out on this date with me?"

She sighed quietly to herself. "Not yet," she answered.

There was a pause as James accepted the answer.

"Have you fallen for me yet?" he asked next.

Lily opened her mouth to immediately respond. She meant to say 'no' but somehow it felt wrong to being saying it. But 'yes' felt wrong too, she wasn't supposed to be falling for him…was she?

"Maybe," she finally answered, just to have something to fill the awkward silence as James waited for his answer.

Another pause.

"Can I kiss you?" he asked. It wasn't in a joking, cocky manner- maybe that was what floored Lily more than the question. It was the sincere, almost vulnerable way he had asked.

She turned to him so they now faced each other directly. "Umm…" She didn't know what to say. James just stared back at her. She reached out with one hand. Her fingertips hovered just off the side of his jaw, as if she was considering it, but James really had no clue what she was thinking and even felt a little stupid for asking.

She drew her hand back suddenly and clutched it to her chest.

"Not yet," she whispered in response.

"Tease," he muttered at her, letting her refusal roll of his back. Hey, he had been dealing with her refusals for years now. Plus, he was an optimistic person. She hadn't completely outright rejected him this time. There was hope…

"Come on, we should get back to town," said Lily, turning her back on James as she started down the path.

"Afraid to be alone with me any longer?" he shouted after her, teasing.

"Whatever James," she yelled in response. However, it wasn't in hate or disdain and James could imagine her rolling her eyes at him as she said it. Yes, there was definitely hope.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

**"**You're quiet," commented Lily to her counterpart who had been walking half a step beside her as they entered town in complete silence.

Shaken from his thoughts, James answered, "Do you feel like we're being watched…?"

"Yeah," Lily replied instantly in agreement, "But I just cracked that up to the fact that Sirius and Kaila have-"  
"Been following us for the last ten minutes," James completed for her.

The two paused on the side of the streets in a silent understanding while students headed back to Hogwarts early brushed past them.

"You can come out now," called Lily, placing a hand jauntily on her hip as Sirius and Kaila came forward from the crowd in which they were hiding, or more like failing to hide. They approached James and Lily only a little embarrassed, probably at their abysmal snooping skills and not at the fact they were stalking their friends while they were on a date.

"You're not very good at being sneaky," admonished James.

"Told you you'd get caught," called another familiar voice from across the street. The group of four turned to see Remus and Miranda who were quite pleased that Sirius and Kaila had been shamefully found out.

"Funny," commented Sirius as the two joined them. "Remus and Miranda were the ones not trying to hide, but they were the ones you didn't notice," he finished, nodding to James.

"That's because you two insisted on trailing James and Lily… dodging clumsily behind trash bins, tripping on your robes as you sneaked around in the shadows…." Remus trailed off in sarcastic drama.

"Well, we didn't want to have to wait 'til the end of the day to figure out what was going on," said Kaila with a wave in Lily and James' direction, who were both amused, as she try to stare down an unaffected Remus.

"So what did you find out?" asked Miranda.

Kaila looked only at her feet as Sirius eventually answered, "Well… we weren't close enough to hear anything…"

Miranda and Remus wore superior expressions as if to say that they had proven their point and had no need to say anymore.

"You know, if you wanted to know what was going on, you could have just asked us," Lily pointed out, with an eyebrow pointedly raised.

"Oh…" was Sirius' only reply.

Kaila, who had seemed to get over her embarrassment, grabbed Lily by the arm. "Well, then get talkin' girl!"

Before going of with her girlfriends, however, Lily turned to James. "Do you mind if I…?" she didn't need to finish, however, James just waved her off. It was a silly question, but a part of her still knew that she had agreed to spend the day with him and she didn't want him to call off the bet if she rejected him because she went with her friends for a few minutes.

Wait, did she say "if" she rejects him? She meant "when"…

As soon as the girls were a safe girly talking distance away, which was gathered around a bench a few blocks down, James turned his attention to his friends.

"So, mate, what's going on? She hasn't torn your head off yet," questioned Sirius all too honestly surprised manner.

James opened his mouth to reply, but closed if after a moment of saying nothing. What _was_ going on?

"She's doesn't hate me," replied James at first, starting small. He knew at least that was true.

Remus and Sirius glanced at each other.

"Well, that's good," Remus said.

"I think she might actually find me a person she kind of likes… at least she tolerates me now…"

"You're rambling," commented Sirius.

"I know," said James, running a hand through his hair nervously. "It's just… I've liked her for a long time. I'm talking really liked her, maybe so much that there was something more."

"You mean love?" questioned Remus.

James nodded. "Yeah, but I didn't know if I loved her or not. I'm seventeen, what do I know about love? But today we have been talking, just talking. She is more amazing than I ever realized. I care about her even more now because she's so…" James trailed off in search for a world.

"Perfect?" suggested Remus with a shrug.

James shook his head to the negative. "No, she's far from perfect…she's so human. You know what I mean? She's real…"

"Okay, she's real, she's human, she exists… what's your point?" demanded Sirius.

"I think I love her," he replied all too seriously and all too easily, like it was the most obviously thing in the world.

"What the bloody hell?!"

James didn't have a reply to Sirius exclamation or Remus' stunned expression. The thought of love have been flittering across his mind for the last few hours and when he just said it aloud, he knew it was true, or at least he believed it to be so. It's funny… he was supposed to be charming her and yet she was the one making him fall for her.

"Wow," said Remus finally, being the first of the two to break out of a silent shock. "Well, this complicates things a bit…"

"What do you mean?" asked James, surprised. "Doesn't love make things easier? I know it's not just a silly crush that is going to go away the second it gets boring."

Remus kneaded his brow for a moment as James and Sirius watched him expectantly for an explanation.

"Just look at it this way. Even if you get Lily to admit that she has fallen for you and will go out with you again, that's all it is. She _may_ get a crush on you. She _may_ get infatuated. But that's all it is. There is no guarantee she will love you too."

"But…" he couldn't come up with a good reply. He hadn't considered that.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to be so negative."

"But you're good at it," quipped Sirius, forcing a joke and a small grin to try and break the grim mood that had overtaken the three friends.

James glanced over where Lily, hair shining in the dying afternoon sunlight, was talking with her friends. He withheld an exasperated sigh. The whole point of this day was to get Lily to the same level that he was on, which was romantically liking each other, nothing more. Now that he loved her, even she did like him in that way, she wouldn't be in love and they'd still be miles apart…

-

"So you haven't ripped Potter's head off yet. What's going on?" asked Kaila in an excited half-whisper as they distanced themselves from the boys.

"Yeah," agreed Miranda. "From the looks of it you were not only getting along, but you seemed to be having a good time…"

"I…" Lily wasn't sure how to describe it. She was still confused about it all herself. "I don't know what it is really. He's… different than I expected, I guess."

Seeing as Lily was not going to volunteer any more information, Kaila prodded, "How so?"

"You know I couldn't stand him before. I haven't been able to stand him for years. But that person that I despised wasn't there today."

"Okay, go on."

"We've spent most of the day talking, just talking. About random stuff too. Our friends, our family, how we see ourselves, how we see each other. And he turned out to be totally different person, but exactly the same as he's always been… you know what I mean?"

"No," answered Kaila and Miranda simultaneously.

Lily couldn't help but roll her eyes.

"I mean," she stated slowly, searching for a way to describe her previous comment. "I saw a different side of him today. One I hadn't seen before. One that was actually decent and clever and …" she trailed off, the word 'sweet' had come to her mind, but she dare not say it ergo her friends get the wrong impression.

"But it wasn't as if he was pretending to be someone else. He was still the same person, a smart aleck, slightly immature, too inquisitive for his own good. But it wasn't as if one personality was a mask hiding the true one, which would have made him a total hypocrite and I would have hated him more for it…"

…

"WHAT?" exclaimed Lily. Her friends had glanced knowingly at each other at the end of her explanation, amused and girlish grins touching their lips.

"We were just checking that the other had noticed how you had been smiling while you were, um well, talking about James Potter," Miranda said coolly.

"Yup," agreed Kaila, head nodding feverishly. "'Cause it is the first time you have ever smiled while talking about said James Potter unless it had been the context of decapitating him."

"Come off it," said Lily, trying to dismiss their line of thinking with a wave of the hand.

"You come off it!" retorted Kaila. "You can't tell me that after you were smiling like an idiot ranting about how much _different_ Potter was than you expected and how he was still _exactly_ the same and how you've been _talking_ all day without telling me that you have at least, just a bit, fallen-"

"I'm not falling in love with Potter!" interrupted Lily.

A stunned silence.

"Hold up," said Kaila. "I haven't said anything about love. I was going to say 'fallen for' Potter."

"Well… I haven't fallen _for_ him either," replied Lily with an exaggerated eye roll, trying to play off her slip of tongue.

Miranda cocked her head to the side and observed her red-headed friend for a moment. "You haven't?" she asked in a quiet, tentative tone.

"I- I can't…" she replied, almost morosely.

"Why not?" questioned Kaila.

"Because," she sighed. "He is everything I have proclaimed to hate over the last six years. I didn't hate _him_; I hated the person he represented. One of those privileged, rich kids. Popular, big- headed, vain. Thinking that just because he didn't discriminate against Muggleborns he was a good person, despite the fact he picked on anyone else he pleased. Using his brains and his talents to torment others…"

"But he's not what you expected," stated Miranda.

"But he's still that person and even if he changes, it was who he used to be."

"And if you agree to go out with him, for real, then you'd be the one thing you don't want to be," filled in Kaila. "A-"

"Hypocrite," Lily finished.

"That's what's holding you back?" asked Kaila for reinforcement.

"That and… okay, I admit it, maybe a small part of me is, what's the expression, love struck. But that's today, when he took me on this wonderful date. But tomorrow or next week back at school when he does something stupid, will I still like him then? I came on this date with the intention to get James off my back. And that's what I still intend to do, despite the fact I am be getting a little crush. I mean, it's the right decision… Isn't it?" She looked to Kaila and Miranda for support.

"Sorry Lils," said Kaila solemnly, "Only you can decide that."

* * *

Aki- Wow, they just keep getting longer and longer... 


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

The Great Hall was bustling with the noise of dinner. Excited students who had just returned from a day in Hogsmeade, others chattering about Quidditch games, and still others moaning about the load of schoolwork they still had to do for Monday. Although surrounded by it, alone and silent sat a boy and girl, side-by-side, both lost in their own thoughts.

Their arms brushed against each other as they ate. They glanced at each other for barely a second before swiftly averting their eyes from those of the other. Lily hid her blush behind a wave of her hair, falling out from behind her ear.

"Sorry." James mumbled to her. She nodded, just barely visible from behind her hair.

'Merlin, I love her,' was the first thing to pass through James' mind, yet again… 'Moony is totally off on this one. There is no way love will mess this up, right? I should just tell her. That would be romantic and girls like romantic. It's not like I'm lying about it. Right, I'll tell her right after dinner and she will smile and lean in and kiss- wait! What if I tell her and she thinks I'm joking- and that this whole day is a big joke- and that I'm a giant git for playing with her like that. Worse, what if she thinks I'm being serious? Will it freak her out? Will she think I'm a crazy stalker and all…? No, I can't tell her…absolutely not…but… Merlin! What do I do?"

Unknowing to an oblivious James, Lily was caught in her own tangled thoughts as well.

'Okay, Lils, this is easy. You have this all under control… I'm such a horrible liar! I don't know what to do. Come on, Potter, do something stupid and make me hate you again- You've always done it so well before, why not now?... Whatever, he is still Potter and I don't like him… but he's not. He's James and he- he knows the different ways I blush and he understands how to be protective of your friends and I talked to him all day and almost kissed him!... I'm so confused. How can I hate him and love him at the same time? No, not love, like. I meant LIKE!... Oh, my. I don't know what I am going to do.'

They were both uncannily silent throughout the meal, especially compared to how open and talkative they had been earlier this very same day. Funnily enough, neither noticed how strange the other was acting because they were too caught up in their own troubling predicaments…

Lily set down her utensils onto her plate with a clatter when she was convinced she could no longer delay by eating slowly. She saw that James had given up on supper as well.

"So, what do you have planned out for the rest of today…?" she asked, trying to seem nonchalant.

"Well," said James slowly, getting up from the table. Lily followed his suit. "I was thinking 'cause we started the day out with a sunrise it would only be proper to send it off with a sunset…"

"So are we heading outside again?" asked Lily as they exited the Great Hall and she noticed James was going in the opposite direction of the Entrance Hall.

"No, somewhere else."

- - - -

About ten minutes and a good walk later Lily found herself at the top of a tower she was unfamiliar with and had a feeling was out of bounds. For some reason it didn't bother her as much as it should have.

"Is this another place you happened to 'discover?'" asked Lily with a hint of a smirk, speculating what circumstances must have brought him here in the past. Doutblessly something exciting and against the rules.

"More or less," replied James, leaning against the rail of the open balcony in the waning evening light.

Lily joined him, electing to stand several feet away from him. She looked over the Hogwarts grounds from this immense height and it took her breath away.

"Everything looks so small from up here," she said just above a whisper. "So…insignificant."

"That's the beauty of it," replied James, not even turning to look at the redhead as he talked, but still staring over the horizon. "When you step back far enough, even mountains seem insignificant."

Lily was silent for a moment before asking, "Why is that beautiful?"

"Because," answered James easily. "If mountains and the sun," he said indicating his hand toward the dipping light, "Or evens stars look small and powerless from far away we still know they are not. It makes me think that if everything can look insignificant, and not just some things, that we all must be significant, despite what we sometimes feel."

"Couldn't it just be that we are all _in_significant instead?" questioned Lily, with curiosity about how James would answer.

He shrugged and turned his head to Lily. "Maybe, but I don't think that's the case."

Lily bit her lip before replying, "Me neither."

The sun was dipping lower and lower in the western sky until its bottom rim grazed the top of the tallest trees in the forest, making them appear to be on fire.

James was completely caught up in the sight and Lily kept carefully watching him out of the corner of her eyes, sometimes making a show of readjusting her hair in order to get a better look at him. Only after a few minutes of this did she realize the fact that she and James had seemed to have changed places. At sunrise he had been the one watching her as she had observed the sun…

This morning she thought he had only showed her the sunrise to try and impress her. To make him seem sensitive or romantic, but now as she watched his face, totally absorbed the sight of the dying light, she knew it was something more. He actually enjoyed it, more then enjoyed, it appeared that he almost…breathed it.

"You are undoubtedly the most interesting person I ever met," said Lily, unable to control it from running off her tongue as the last of the sun was hidden behind horizon.

"What?" he asked, looking at the girl with an eyebrow raised.

"I mean," said Lily uneasily, floundering for the words to explain her statement. "Sometimes you seem to be moving so fast…" she trailed off, hoping James understood her reference to his endless pranks, his exuberance with his friends and Quidditch, his fast and crazy lifestyle all together. He nodded and she continued, "Yet still you take the time to watch sunsets and talk to some girl all day long…"

"Well, life isn't just one speed, I guess," replied James.

"I guess not," agreed Lily. The sun was completely behind the horizon now and night was taking the day's place. Lily was sad that the day was coming to the end, she wanted it to just stand still because as soon as the day ended she would have to make a choice she was nowhere near ready to make.

"I get it," Lily whispered after a moment of contemplation. "You love life. You want get everything out of it. See everything, do everything, except maybe follow the rules…"

"You had to get a dig on me in there somewhere, didn't you?"

"But I'm right, aren't I? That's what it is?" asked Lily.

"Yeah, I guess. I never put it to words before, but that sounds right."

Lily sighed and sank back against the outer wall of the tower, sliding slowly to a sitting position on the floor.

"Are you okay?" asked James, concern in his voice, sitting down next to her.

"I'm fine," she whispered unconvincingly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear as she did so. She kept her eyes downcast, staring at her hands in her lap, not daring to meet James's hazel eyes.

James knew she wasn't okay, but he left her alone. He sat beside her silently, his head leaned against the stone wall, watching the sky darken and the stars become more visible.

"We should be getting back to the common room," he commented idly.

"Why?" asked Lily, still not looking at him.

"It's almost after hours...and we're out of bounds as it is…"

"So?"

"Aren't you worried about getting in trouble? Don't you have, like, a clean record…?"

"Clean record? Actually, no. Am I worried…?" She was silent for a moment in thought. Was she worried about getting in trouble? "Not tonight."

"If you say so…" James said before lightly placing his hand on top of Lily's. She turned her head just a fraction of an inch further from his, she closed her eyes tightly as she tried to hold back tears.

She didn't want to…but she knew what she had to do.

* * *

Aki- Well, hope you liked that and pleez don't kill me over the ending. My beta already told me I was evil for this cliffhanger... 


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

"Come on, and be quiet," whispered James to Lily as they sneaked around the corner from the bottom of the tower on top of which they had spent their night. They had spent several long, silent hours watching the moon trace across the sky and the stars twinkle and fall against the black night. So long that now they had to sneak to the common room lest they be caught and punished.

"You are way too good at this," commented Lily in a hushed tone as James pulled back an embroidered wall drapery to reveal a secret passage that Lily had never even heard rumors of before.

"Well, I am an expert," he replied as they entered the darkness of the passage. She let him lead her, her hand in his, down the pathway until, several minutes later, it opened up behind a moving wall into a corridor Lily recognized as being a floor below Gryffindor Tower's entrance.

"Careful," James instructed, peering carefully down the poorly lit hallway both ways. Hands still held, they went together down the corridor towards the staircase, walking on their tiptoes. Everything was going alright…until they heard the voice of none other than Filch and spotted the light of his lantern coming swiftly upon them from the opposite end of the hall. Both James and Lily paused, Lily more so in shock.

"Run," he said.

"What?!" she asked breathlessly. Hadn't he told her as they left the tower that they had to be quiet and take their time?

"Run!" he urged again in a shouted whisper, tugging at her hand, breaking her from her stunned trance.

They took off violently. Their footsteps echoed loudly and unmistakably off the walls. Filch, hearing them, tried to race after the unidentified offenders, but was quickly winded. He was no match for two young kids. Instead he yelled threats and curses at their retreating backs, but Lily and James never even stopped to listen.

They raced down the next corridor before swerving so sharply around a corner that Lily stumbled. Only James, arms around her middle, kept her from completely falling. After she paused and regained herself they tore up the nearest set of steps and headed to their common room.

They skidded to a stop in front of a familiar portrait. James, gasping for breath, called out the password. The Fat Lady reprimanded them for being out so late, before swinging open to allow them entrance.

Together they stumbled into the empty common room. Lily made her way to an armchair and collapsed into it.

"Merlin," she swore between her rough breaths, clutching a hand to her chest. "My heart is beating so fast…"

"I know," James replied, quite literally breathless, sitting on the floor next to where she sat on a couch.

"That was so-" Lily said between her heavy, yet calming, breaths, "So exhausting… so terrifying…so… fun…"

"I know," repeated James, though this time with a smirk, looking up at her knowingly.

She raised her eyebrows questioningly.

"Maybe you can appreciate now why I have never stopped breaking the rules. It's more fun this way." He said.

"I'd think I'd die if I had to do that again," replied Lily, shaking her head with a small smile on her face.

"You _could_ do it again," James assessed, staring into the dying fire. "If you couldn't, you wouldn't have called it 'fun.'"

"I guess you're right," agreed Lily, adding silently in her head, 'again.' This seemed to her like the millionth time that day when he explained something to her and she just had to agree he was correct.

James glanced at his watch. "Eleven fifty-eight," he announced, not meeting her eyes.

Lily was silent for a few seconds before asking, "Does your watch happen to be fast by any chance?"

James glanced up at Lily and shook his head, confusion showing in his features at her question.

She sighed outwardly and pushed herself out of the chair. James got himself off the floor and they stood, facing each other. They stood closer than friends usually stood, but still distant enough to feed doubt to the other's intentions.

"I know I asked you this before, about halfway through the date, but now that we are at the end…" he trailed off, hoping his explanation would suffice. Lily nodded for him to continue. "Do you regret going out on this date with me?"

Oh, it was _that _question he was referring to.

It wasn't a bad day, but it didn't make it any less hard on her. He had made her doubt herself too much, but was it worth it…

"Maybe," she answered elusively.

"Have you fallen for me yet?" he asked next with barely a hesitation.

Merlin, how was she supposed to answer this truthfully?

"Maybe," she said, trying to keep her voice from wavering.

She knew what was coming next…

"Can I kiss you?"

She paused.

"No," she replied.

A half a moment of nothingness. No him, no her, just that word that hung in the air in between them. Neither understood it, or maybe neither wanted to understand it. It came without hesitation and was accepted without shock. Everything, even the air they breathed seemed dense. He didn't want it to end this way, and, funnily enough, neither did she.

She took half a step forward just a tense second or two later, rose onto her toes and planted a kiss, ever so softly and chastely, on the corner of James mouth, as if she couldn't decide between kissing him on the cheek or on the lips.

"But that doesn't mean I can't kiss you," she explained in a whisper. "Night, James," then she turned and fled up the stairs to her dormitory

"Night," he whispered hoarsely, long after she had disappeared.

He stood alone in the common room. He didn't know what to think or what to feel. Lily Evans, the girl of his dreams, had just kissed him. The problem was he wasn't sure if it had been a kiss of loving acceptance, or a kiss of soft rejection.

He hoped it was the former, but he didn't want to get his hopes up. He would like to think that after all he and Lily had been through today that it was a kiss of undoubting but shy acceptance…of like…of love…of whatever romantic term it could be labeled under. Another part of him…well, another part of him wasn't so optimistic.

He trudged up to his dorm. He snuck in carefully and quietly because he didn't want to disturb his dorm mates, for selfish reasons rather than being polite. He didn't want them asking questions to how it went, if he and Lily kissed, or if he had gotten the beautiful redhead to fall for him when he himself didn't know yet.

He lay down on his bed and drew his curtains without undressing. So what if he was wearing his shoes to bed, it didn't matter to him right now… nothing seemed to matter.

He knew he was going to have a very restless night.

-

Lily had also avoided her friends, swiftly changed, drew the curtains aground her bed. She was now wrapped in a blanket, sitting on the center of her bed, much too awake than she should be at this hour.

She cursed herself out loud in a whisper. She couldn't believe that she did that. She had fully anticipated turning down James Potter, but instead she had kissed him, giving him the entirely wrong impression.

She buried her face in her hands in half-hearted aggravation, as if only half of her being regretted such actions.

Yet, there was still tomorrow, this could still be made right… right?

Even if she could 'fix this' did she want to? Is that really what she wanted? Would that actually be the _right_ thing to do?

'Gaa! Stop doubting yourself, Lils!' she yelled mentally. "It's Potter," she said hushed voice to herself. "James Potter… James," her voice cracked as she said his name, threatening tears.

Lily was too stubborn and prideful to let herself cry over a boy, so she cried over herself instead…and the mess she had gotten herself into.

* * *

Aki- I didn't think I would get this up this weekend because I had SAT's, a birdal shower, and a college visit, but I made the time. I figured I'd had a bunch of murderous people after me if I didn't update...

Oh yeah, if you think this is almost the end you are soooo... wrong.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

"What happened?"

Lily was woken as Kaila jumped onto her bed. She turned over and groaned, hiding her face in her pillow.

"Oh, you couldn't play that 'sleeping' trick on me, Lils. What happened?"

"I don't know," mumbled Lily from her pillow.

"You don't know?" asked Kaila skeptically.

"Mmhmm…"

"How can you not know? Did you decide to go out with Potter or not? What happened?!"

"I don't know!" Lily yelled, sitting up in her bed.

Kaila was stunned silent by her friend's action.

Lily sighed and ran a hand through her hair. "I'm sorry," she muttered. "I'm not mad at you. I just- still need to figure some stuff out. I'm going to talk to James after breakfast.

"Okay…"

----

"So, Man, what happened?"

"I'm not quite sure…"

"Wow, he's thicker than I thought-OUCH!"

"Seriously, James," said Remus, taking over for a fuming Sirius, "What happened?"

"Well, she kissed me…sort of," James responded as the group made their way down to the Great Hall.

"Well that's good...I think," replied Sirius cheekily.

"I don't know," James said, almost wearily, as they sat down together to eat breakfast. "She seemed to be…doubting herself. There were moments where I was sure I had her, but others… others where she was drifting away."

Silence, none of them knew what to say.

A few minutes later, James noticed Lily coming to breakfast with her friends. They sat far away, at the opposite end of the long table. He was partially grateful for this. Despite having all night, he still had not been able to figure out what was going on in Lily's head and what he was going to say to her.

Breakfast was uneasy for both Lily and James. Both unsure what to say to each other in an imminent meeting, unsure how to reply to their friend's questions, and having friends unsure to talk to them.

An eternity and sixteen minutes later, Lily got up from her seat with a sigh. She had no appetite and… there was something she had to do.

"James, can we talk?"

He looked up at the redheaded girl standing behind him, a bit surprised he hadn't noticed her approach and only slightly amused how their position had been reversed from the day he had come up behind her at breakfast to talk.

"Okay," he agreed, standing himself. He knew neither one of them wanted to have a discussion in public at the moment. They walked silently out of the Great Hall, trying to ignore several pairs of eyes following them.

"So…" drawled James, trying to break the uneasy silence that hung between them; they reached an empty corridor and stopped to face each other. "How are you doing?"

"Fine," Lily replied, her voice pitched a bit too high.

"Right…"

"You?" asked Lily, trying to contribute to the pathetic excuse for a conversation.

"I'm good."

A pause.

"This was so much easier yesterday," James commented with a touch of humor in his voice.

"Yeah, it was," agreed Lily with a small grin.

Another pause.

"You wanted to talk to me about something?" James prompted, although he really did not want to get near such a sensitive subject he assumed she would bring up, it had to be better than standing in the awkwardness they were sharing.

"Right," Lily agreed. "About yesterday…we never really- clarified what was going on with us."

"Yeah, I noticed."

"I-," she paused, her voice caught in her thought. Words she needed to say, had planned to say, were refusing to come out of her mouth.

James was watching her expectantly.

"I can't go out with you."

"What?" he asked, stunned.

"I can't- don't want to go out with you," Lily repeated, voice stronger and more assured.

"Wha-" James seemed to be having trouble getting a hold on the situation, on what Lily was saying, even if it was what his pessimistic side had been expecting. "Why?" he finally stuttered out.

"Because, I didn't fall for you,"

It surprised them both that she sounded like she was telling the truth.

"What about the kiss?" James asked, part of him trying to catch her in a lie, another part just wanting answers to his curiosity.

"I got caught up in the moment," explained Lily with a one-shoulder shrug. "It was midnight, we were alone, and the fire was dying. It just seemed right at the time, but it meant nothing more."

"I can't believe that," replied James, more to himself than to the girl across from him.

"I'm sorry, but it's the truth."

"Then why are you being so nice about it?" asked James curiously. "Shouldn't you be shoving it in my face that you won, that you were right?"

"Look, I don't hate you. I even like you as person, maybe even as a casual acquaintance or a friend if things were different. I hadn't before and I was wrong. I was wrong about you and the person you were."

"Oh." He guessed it was better than her hating him, but it still wasn't what he wanted.

"I didn't fall for you," Lily repeated as though she were trying to convince more than one person.

"Okay." James looked up from the spot he was staring at on the floor to lock with Lily's eyes. His gaze was so intense the redhead wanted to take half a step back, but she couldn't for she was glued to the spot.

"But I want you to know," he continued, these words unplanned, spontaneous, yet perfectly calculated, "That I fell for _you_."

Lily cocked her head just slightly to the side in confusion, without breaking their gaze.

"I thought I had liked you a lot before, but I had no clue. Yesterday I met someone that was perfectly everything that I would ever want. I fell hard and fast for you, Lily."

She bit her lip when he said her name. The way he said it was so…loaded. It was with passion, with tenderness, with honesty, with hurt and sadness, and something else….something else she didn't quite know…

"I love you."

He almost cringed. He hadn't planned to say it when he started, he was not quite sure he had meant to say it at all, but it popped into his head and flew out of his mouth.

Lily was still for a whole second before replying. "You…what?"

"I…" he couldn't go back on it now, "I love you."

"James," she said, almost in a whine, finally breaking from their eye lock and turning away from him in exasperation. "Don't."

"It's true."

"Then I am even more sorry," Said Lily turning back to face him. "because even if I liked you enough to go out with you, it wouldn't work."

"How so?"

"Because we'd feel differently about each other. We'd be expecting different things from the relationship. You'd be wanting me to catch up and love you back and that would ruin it."

"I don't think it would be that way," James rebutted softly, even though he knew this was a moot point and there was no purpose in arguing it.

"It would," replied Lily firmly, but lightly. 'And it gives me more justification to say no to you now,' she added in her head. "Like I said, I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong idea last night…"

Students began to dribble out of the Great Hall and wander down their way.

"I gotta go to class," Lily commented to end their conversation and walked away.

James was left standing there, staring after her as the bustling crowd around him thickened, thinking that it wasn't supposed to end this way.

Lily sighed, unaware of James' feelings, but unsure if her sigh was one of relief or regret.

* * *

Aki- Heh, heh...heh... Pleeze don't kill me. Come on, its going to have a happy ending, I just want to drag out this story for a while. Making them get together too fast is no fun at all! 


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

"That sucks. I'm so sorry, mate."

"Yeah, I am too, James."

"I guess… I don't know. I didn't want it to end like this…" James said as he rubbed his eyes wearily with his wrist.

The three friends were sitting in am empty corridor while the rest of the school ate lunch. It was the first real chance they had gotten to talk since breakfast because of morning classes.

"It was stupid to think that I could actually make her fall for me."

"Don't be so hard on yourself, Prongs." comforted Sirius.

"You were right Moony, it was a hopeless hope."

"No," Remus replied. "I was wrong. It's better to have hope."

"I used to believe that…"

"Well, you've made me believe it."

"Why?" James asked.

"Because…if you never have hope, you have nothing to hold onto. Nothing to look forward to. Nothing to live for. Don't we spend our whole lives hoping for tomorrow to come?"

"That was very philosophical, Moony." commented Sirius appraisingly.

"Thanks."

"Still, what do I do about this… her. I just- I don't know what I'm going to do. She said no for real this time."

"Look, mate, maybe this is a good thing."

James looked at Sirius incredulously.

"How?"

"You may think you're in love, but you're only seventeen. You have your whole life to move on. Now you aren't holding onto something that…wasn't meant to be."

"Do you really believe that?" asked James, with a bit of skepticism and a bit of appreciation in his tone.

"Yeah, I do."

"I guess I could try. I mean, I should, shouldn't I?"

Both Sirius and Remus nodded in approval.

"I know she's your first girl and it's always hard to get over them, but you do, eventually."

"How many girls ago was your first girl, Sirius?" asked James with a small smirk.

"That's not the point," replied Sirius, scowling.

"I've spent the last, how many is it now, years chasing after her. It feels weird just to give up," noted James thoughtfully.

"You're not giving up."

"I know, but… part of me feels like I should be working on some new plan to win her heart…"

"James," reasoned Remus softly, "You did everything you could. It's not up to you anymore."

James sighed to himself, scratching the back of his neck idly. They made sense, but his mates just didn't get it. They didn't know what it was like…

"Look, you two go to lunch. Peter should already be there stuffing his face and wondering where you are."

"What about you?" asked Remus.

"I just, need some time to think… Alone." He added when Sirius opened his mouth to suggest staying with him.

"Okay."

"Do you really believe that," asked Remus to Sirius as they walked away from their distraught friend. "That he is only seventeen, he can get over her. That it's a good thing because now he can move on?"

"…"

"Sirius?"

"No," he answered after a reflective pause. "But I want James to believe it."

…

James stood from where he sat and stretched his arms above his head before he began walking slowly down the abandoned corridor. They didn't get it. They just didn't get it.

Neither of them had been in love before. Not really. Remus seemed too reserved, too secretive to allow himself to get that close to another person and although Sirius had dated his fair share of girls, it had never gotten as deep as actual love.

Love was a strange and complicated…thing. It was more than an emotion, more than a feeling. It wasn't something you could get over from sleeping on it or with some journaling. It wasn't lust, it wasn't infatuation, or passion, or compassion…it was something entirely different. It was the air he breathed. The colors he saw. It was a way of life. It was in his walk and his words. He couldn't just cast it aside. He couldn't just let go. He couldn't just move on.

He knew it sounded like a line from one of those romance novels his mother read in her spare time, but love deserves a chance. He wanted to fall on his knees before her and …He wanted to grab her and kiss her with all his… He wanted to surprise her with a hundred lilies for… but he knew he couldn't.

He had promised her that… well, he wasn't allowed to ask her out again. That was a promise, a swear, his word. He wouldn't break that, especially not to her, to the woman he loved. Now here's the rub about love. In its purest, most innocent form, when it is still uncorrupted by human greed and selfishness, love cares more about the other person, more than yourself. And if she really didn't want him, then, because he loved her, he should let her go.

It didn't make it any easier on James, but he knew that it would be right.

He paused and looked out the window to the grounds, the bright sunlight making the world an even more vivid shade of brilliance than it usually was in the cloudy, English countryside.

And as he let her go, he guessed he owed it to himself to move on. So maybe someone else could get his love one day and he could be loved in return.

…

Books banged down onto the desk next to Lily, breaking her from her silent stupor.

"Okay," started Kaila. "I know you said you needed time to figure some stuff out, but it's been long enough. I need to know what's happening!"

"You've been silent all day," added Miranda, sitting on the opposite side of Lily than Kaila.

"What happened?"

"Alright, I'll tell you. When I talked to James after breakfast I told him that I couldn't go out with him. That I didn't fall for him."

"Oh," said Kaila sympathetically.

"Then he told me that he-he had fallen for me and that he…"

"He what?" prompted Miranda with anticipation after a moment's pause in Lily's speech.

"He told me," she said, fighting back her emotions, "That he loved me."

Kaila gasped silently. She honestly hadn't been expecting that, and by the looks of it, neither had Lily.

"It wasn't supposed to be like this," she said quietly, desperately. "It wasn't supposed to be this hard to turn down James Potter. I wasn't supposed to fa…"

"What? Do what?" asked Kaila.

Lily bit her lip and closed her eyes and shook her head. She didn't want to respond. She couldn't.

Kaila and Miranda watched her, concerned.

"I'm okay," she whispered after a few moments.

"I wish that were true," replied her concerned friend.

Just then, the last student of the class came through the side classroom door. Lily watched him walk across the classroom to where his friends were, before averting her eyes back to the pages of her book. The words blurred before her stinging eyes as she wondered how she could feel this bad over someone she never even had…never even wanted.

…

"Prongs, where were you? You were almost late and you know how McGonagall is about that."

"Sorry, I was just…lost in thought."

He glanced across the room to see the redhead of his affections and his heart dropped, just a little. It was easy to convince himself of moving on alone in the hallway, but when he saw her….everything changed.

He pondered why it hurt so much to lose something he never even really had…

* * *

Aki- Ah, the much awaited update. This is kind of a filler chapter, but even filler chapters have their purposes. Anyway, I want to take some time to thank my readers, double thank my reviewers, and triple thank my awesome beta who is the reason you are not reading a whole bunch of typos. 


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

Lily found it a little funny that just a little less than a week ago she was so nervous about going on a date with James Potter. It seemed forever ago that she felt that way. And this –oh, dare she name this feeling inside? Dare she admit it? No, not yet. Not even to herself. Dare she say she regretted turning him away?

It had been an agonizing week. Both at the top with their grades, Lily and James shared almost every class. There was no escaping him. No way of escaping seeing him quieter than usual, or to avoid the feeling of the will power of them both trying to avert their eyes from the other, or the look of shame on their faces when they couldn't and were caught.

And now, she was just standing in the shadows, books held tightly against her chest as anger welled up from deep inside her as she watched that little… no good flirt cozy up to James in the middle of the hallway. Did she have no decency?

"It's called jealousy," a voice whispered in her ear, making her jump in surprise.

"Don't sneak up on me like that, Kaila," Lily reprimanded her friend. "And I'm not jealous of James Potter."

"Oh, of course not. You're jealous of that fake-tan Ravenclaw girl flirting with James Potter."

"Am not," Lily protested quietly, but she did not sound very convincing.

"Yeah," replied Kaila softly, "You are, 'cause you wish that was you."

Lily shook her head 'no.'

"But you have nothing to worry about. He's not interested," said Kaila.

"What?" said Lily, turning to her friend, trying to hide the relief in her voice.

"Can't you see that he is trying to blow her off? But this chick is not very perceptive."

"It doesn't matter to me."

"Yes it does, and you've got to realize that one day, even this school year, a girl is gonna come along that James is interested in that's not you."

…

The last class of Friday, NEWT level Potions. Only a few students remained in the rigorous class taught by Professor Slughorn, four of them were Gryffindors: Lily, Miranda, James, and Remus.

"The potion that we will be making today is very difficult and complex, and it is best to have two set of hands per cauldron so I want everybody to pair up," instructed the Professor. There was an instant scramble about the room.

"Miranda, ask Remus to be your partner," Lily whispered out of the corner of her mouth.

"What?!"

"Quick, before someone else does."

Miranda didn't understand, but quicker turned on her stool to the desk behind her and asked "Remus, will you be my partner?" just as James was opening his mouth to ask the same thing.

Remus, being both too kind and courteous to refuse, gave James a little 'sorry' look before collected his school things to sit next to Miranda.

"Why did I ask Remus to be my partner?" Miranda questioned her friend quietly. Lily's eyes drifted almost unnoticeably to the partnerless James and Miranda got her answer.

"I guess we are together," Lily said to James, turning to where he sat.

"I guess," he replied, but Lily could not read his expression. He neither looked happy or upset.

They started making their potion in silence, working to prepare their ingredients flawlessly. It was as if they had been partners since their first year. Every now and then the other would make a comment about how their potion was coming along, but that was it, and it was killing Lily.

With about fifteen minutes left in class when all of them needed to brew the potion slowly, Lily decided to speak up.

"You don't talk to me anymore," she said, trying to layer her voice and expression with faux nonchalance.

"What?" he asked, thrown off by her sudden, off-topic comment.

"You don't talk to me anymore," she repeated, clarifying none.

"Well…I'm not supposed to ask you out anymore, which is usually what I talk to you about."

"Oh," she replied, she guessed she hadn't thought of that. They only ever _really_ talked on their one date. Why did she fool herself into thinking they had that kind of connection all along? Was it because she had wanted them to? Nay, that was a foolish thought.

"You can, you know," she said after several moments of silence.

James glanced her way.

"Talk to me."

"… I'm not sure if I want to."

Lily bit her lip and looked downward at the desk, heart aching in her chest.

"Sorry, that sounded meaner out loud than in my head. I mean, it's just- hard to talk to you."

"I don't not like you. You are a better person than I pegged you for."

"But you don't like me the way I like you."

Lily opened her mouth to respond, but no words came. What did she want to do, tell him he was wrong?

"Class, please bottle a sample of your potions for grading."

The classroom erupted into movement, all the students swiftly getting ready to depart for the beginning of their weekend. Lily ended up being the one have to bottle their sample and by the time she got back to the desk, James had disappeared.

She pushed through the crowd of students at the doorway, much to their loud protests, and out into the hallway.

She glanced both ways, before taking the path that was the quickest out of the dungeons, hoping to catch up with James.

"James!' she yelled as she reached the top of the stairs that lead out of the dungeons, out of breath.

He paused and turned to face her. "What?"

"I-," what did she want to say to him this much? "I- can't we be friends?"

He shook his head, an almost amused expression on his face. "You just don't get it, do you?"

"I don't?" she retorted, bitterly. "What, do you hate me or something?"

"I don't hate you, quite the opposite actually."

"Then what's the problem?" Lily asked, almost whining.

"I can't…stand being around you. It's hard enough being in the same classes and working in the library at the same time or being in the common room. I can't deal with talking with you. Being close to you and not being with you… it kills me."

"But," Lily tried to interrupt, again, without knowing what she was going to say, but James continued.

"And all I want now is to get over you."

"Over me?" she wondered aloud. Was that really what he wanted to do?

"Yes, I want to be able to move on. I mean, you said it first, it won't work. I care for you, a lot, but you don't care the same way for me. We wouldn't work as a couple and we wouldn't work as friends. Because if we were friends, I'd keep holding onto an unrealistic hope."

"James…"

"And that not fair for either you or me. I just have to move on, don't you understand?"

"You can't move on that fast. I don't think it's possible."

"Well, I have to try. It's hard to do, especially when I can barely take my thoughts off of you."

"Really?" she asked, touched, even though James was too blinded in his own rant to notice.

"So please, please, can you leave me alone."

'_No,' _a small voice in Lily's head persisted even though the logical part of her was telling her that this, James leaving her alone, was what she wanted from the time she accepted his bet. She just didn't realize how much a part of her life he had become.

"James, I-"

"It's only fair. Can't you respect that-"

"James," she said louder.

"I mean, you even said it-"

"James," she shouted. "Will you shut up for just a minute?!"

He was taken back, but he indeed fell silent.

"Do you really think I ran after you to ask you if we could friends?! I care about you, James. I really do. Last weekend you proved to me that you were something more, someone who I could- I could fall for. And I wish… I wish that I could be with you, but I can't! I can't! So don't go thinking that you are the only one hurting right now. I just thought it would be easier to make things okay between us, but I guess I was wrong! I've seemed to be wrong about a lot of things lately. Well, James Potter, you are not the only one who has to get over someone!"

A silent moment between them. Lily slapped a hand to her agape mouth when she realized what she just said. Funnily enough, that regret she refused to admit she felt earlier, all week long, was nowhere to be found. Only shock and a little bit of hurt. She was too confused to know.

"Lily… what do you mean?" James asked quietly, taking a step towards her, wanting to know if she had said what he had thought she had said.

She dropped her hand from her mouth. "You know what I mean."

"Lily…"

"I've got to go," she said, and turned and ran, both thankful and hurt that James wasn't running after her.

* * *

Aki- Hope you like! 


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

"Oh, Merlin. Oh, Merlin. Oh, Merlin…" Lily repeated, pacing around her empty dormitory. She couldn't believe what she had just done.

The door opened, and in came Kaila and Miranda.

"What happened?" asked Kaila urgently and interestedly.

"You know?" asked Lily in horror, wondering how many people in the school would know by now.

Kaila shook her head no, relieving Lily's concerns. "Just what Miranda's told me. That you paired with James during Potions, and then you disappeared right after class."

Lily sighed, sitting down on her bed. "It's…complicated."

"Complicated?" repeated Miranda, eyebrow raised in question. "What did you say to him? Don't deny it, I saw you two chatting during Potions."

Lily licked her lips nervously as her friends' eyes scrutinized her. She knew they were only asking for her own good, she was not good at keeping things bottled up inside her as demonstrated earlier that very day. However she felt like they were intruding on something that wasn't their business.

"I-," she began, both Kaila and Miranda leaning in closer to hear her words. "I asked him why he didn't talk to me anymore. He kind of evaded the answer and I pestered him about it. After class I ran after him. He told me it hurt too much…"

"What hurt?" asked Kaila in an anxious whisper.

"Talking to me, being around me, just _thinking_ about me. He said because he – because he loved me-"

"WHAT!?" shouted Miranda and Kaila simultaneously, making Lily remember that she hadn't revealed that little detail to her friends from her and James' last confrontation. She only told them that she had said "no" to going out with him.

"Oh, you haven't heard nothing yet," Lily replied to their outburst, amusing herself. "James said because he loved me so much and I didn't care about him in the same way, he wanted to be away from me so he could get over it, over me."

Lily paused in thought. She closed her eyes and remembered the pained tone of voice he used when telling her that, almost bringing her to tears.

"And?" prompted one of her friends, she wasn't sure which; she was so lost in her own thoughts.

"And…I snapped."

"Snapped?" asked Kaila.

Lily nodded. "Snapped," she repeated. "I snapped and told him something I hadn't even been sure of until I said it."

"What?" interrupted Miranda, too interested to be patient.

"Well first I told him to shut up."

Kaila and Miranda glanced at each other, but said nothing, for once.

"Then I told him that he _was_ the kind of guy I could fall for. That he had proved it to me last weekend. I told him that I did fall for him and that I cared for him. That I wished I could be with him, but I couldn't, so he better stop thinking he's the only one hurting over this situation." Lily's tone said she finished her story.

"And then?"

"And then I ran and have been up here ever since."

"Wow," said Miranda.

"I concur," agreed Kaila.

"So, why can't you be with him?" asked Miranda after a moment's silence, sitting down next to her friend, Kaila followed.

Lily opened her mouth to respond, but no words came out.

"Lils?"

"I used to have a whole list of reasons. I even remember telling you some when we were in Hogsmeade last weekend, but I can't seem to remember any of them now. And the few I do remember are so stupid. I guess it is just my damn pride," Lily said, collapsing back onto the bed tearfully.

"What do you mean by that?" asked Kaila softly, soothing. "Your pride…?"

Lily sighed weakly, hating herself for crying over this, but not caring enough to stop the tears from escaping her eyes and rolling down her face.

"It's," she started to answer, "It's every time I ever told him I hated him, that he was despicable, a horrible human being. Every time I told him all the crazy things I'd do rather than go out on a date with him…"

"Like spend a night in the Forbidden Forest."

"Date the Giant Squid."

"Kidnap Mrs. Norris,"

"Not helping," said Lily, a laugh intermingled with her sob.

"Lils," said Miranda, grabbing her hand reassuringly, "Why does any of that matter anymore?"

Lily sighed. "It matters because I used to have everything in place in my life and he just changed everything over this last week. I don't what to think anymore. I'm so confused."

"That's okay," reassured Kaila, "Because we'll be here to help you figure it out."

"Thanks," answered Lily silently. She had the best, best friends in the world.

"She did what?!" asked Sirius loudly, getting the attention of several other occupants of the common room. He gave them an angry glare that told them to mind their own business.

"James, are you sure?" asked Remus, leaning forward in his seat.

"No, I made it up," James replied sarcastically

"Hey, calm down, Prongs," warned Sirius.

"I'm sorry, it's just…" James groaned loudly. "Why is she tormenting like this."

"Tormenting?" said Sirius, questioning the choice of words.

"Yes," replied James. "First she wants nothing to do with me, then she agrees to go on a date with me, and then she says she likes me as a person but not as a boyfriend, and then she tells me she has fallen for me, but doesn't want to go out with me," he ranted, before sitting down with a huff in an empty armchair.

"I guess 'tormenting' is the right word."

James shot Sirius a glare for his joke.

"Well, James, look at the bright side," said Remus.

"What bright side?" James asked darkly.

"Yeah, what bright side?" Sirius repeated, playing along with James' frustration, but really only joking around.

Remus resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "The bright side. Ya' know. Like the fact that Lily doesn't hate you anymore, that she thinks you are a decent person. Or the fact that she even kind of fell for you."

"But she doesn't want to be with me," interrupted James.

"Well, yeah, but I was just trying to overlook that part."

James 'tsk'ed. "Good try."

A silence fell between the three friends.

"This sucks," said Sirius, plopping his head back against the back of the couch.

"I concur," said Remus.

James grunted in agreement.

The three sighed simultaneously.

"I hate this," James whispered.

"What of the million things that are bothering you today do you hate the most," asked Sirius, staring idly at the ceiling.

"The fact that I can't figure out what is so horrible about me that she likes me, but still doesn't want to go out with me."

"Still caught up on that, are w-?" began Sirius, but Remus cut him off.

"There is nothing horrible about you," reassured Remus.

"Yeah, you're a top notch guy," added Sirius.

"If I'm a top notch guy then why-?"

"Does Lily not want to be with you?" finished Sirius, "We know."

"I'm sorry," said James, knowing how annoying he most be getting, "But I just don't know what to do. What to think." He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I'm just so confused. I used to have everything in place. I knew who I was and what I liked, and I liked Lily Evans, but I didn't expect it to get so messed up…"

"We don't have any answers, Prongs," said Remus. "Only Lily knows so I suggest you go talking to her."

"That's easier said than done. For one, I don't even know where she is."

"I think she's hiding in her dorm," informed Sirius rather unhelpfully.

"Two, I'm afraid that she will take it all back," added James.

"She practically screamed it at you. She can't take it back and if she does, she's lying," reasoned Sirius thoughtfully.

"Three, I'm afraid of the reason she has for not wanting to date me."

"She can't have _any_ good reason to if you think about it," replied Sirius for the third time.

"Moony, do you have anything to add?" asked James, turning to his strangely quiet friend.

Remus had a strange look on his face, the same he wore when he was working on a particularly difficult Arithmancy problem, extreme concentration. After a few seconds, his eyes cleared in a knowing manner.

"James?" he asked tentatively, "What exactly were the terms to your bet again?"


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

"Are you sure that will work?" asked James anxiously as Remus finished his idea.

"That's such a lame technicality," commented Sirius.

Remus threw his friend a look. "It wasn't my bet, it was James' and those were the terms."

"So what are you going to do, Prongs, talk to her at dinner or something?"

"No," said James, shaking his head. "I'm gonna talk to her in private, not make it a show. Just like you said, Remus, back before this whole mess started."

"Oh, so apparently Moony is right about everything now, is he?" mocked Sirius.

"Shut up, Padfoot," Remus retorted.

James smirked at his friends' antics. He had the best friends in the world.

…

"Are you coming to dinner?" Miranda asked Lily, still up in their dormitory, comforting the redhead about her outburst.

She shook her head. "I'm not really hungry. And I don't want to face anyone right now, especially…" she trailed off.

"…Potter," Kaila finished for her. Lily nodded.

"That's okay," said Miranda.

"We'll bring you something back."

The two left the Gryffindor common room and were walking down the corridor, some of the last stragglers coming to the evening meal.

"She'll be okay….right?" asked Miranda, concerned.

Kaila nodded thoughtfully. "She will, eventually."

"What do you thing is going to happen with her and Potter?"

Kaila sighed. "Right now, I haven't a clue in the world."

They entered the almost filled Great Hall and grazed their eyes over the table for two empty seats. At one end sat Remus, Sirius, and Peter…

"Where's Potter?" asked Kaila in an urgent whisper to her shorter friend.

"I only know one thing," replied Miranda, "Not here."

…

Lily found out really fast that the dorm got really boring when there was no one to talk to. She tried to get some of her homework done, but she even found that impossible. Deciding that a change of scenery would do best for her unfocused mind, she peeked her head out of her doorway to find an empty common room. She silently went down the stairs and sat in a large, cushy armchair by the vacant fireplace.

Lily soon realized that the common room was only a terribly slight improvement to the dorm, although an improvement none the less. She stayed. The silence was killing her, always dragging her back to the moment when she had confessed her feelings for a certain James Potter. She regretted it, except that…the more and more she thought about it, she didn't. She was just worried about what was going to happen next.

Would everyone find out, and would she become the laughing stock of the school? What would they say? What would James say when she inevitably saw him again? Would he look even more hurt and destroyed, thus having her heart ache for him? Would he laugh in her face at her outburst? Would he say that none of it was ever real and that he was just stringing her along?

All the ideas; all the horrible, impossible scenarios. The things she knew were untrue but still haunted her as her too strong imagination tormented her…

She wanted to pretend it didn't matter, but she couldn't…

The portrait hole swung open to reveal…

"Oh, hello, Lily," greeted James, much too cheery for Lily's liking.

"Hello," she replied slowly, unsure of his behavior. She followed him with her eyes as he went across the common room, where he dropped his book bag onto a table across the room from her.

"You're missing dinner," he commented lightly, his back to her.

"You are, too," she retorted.

He shrugged, turning to face her. "I suppose I am."

Lily sighed inwardly. This was her moment to explain everything. Here it was, her and James, conveniently alone.

"About earlier-," she started, but James interrupted, waving it off.

"It's okay."

"It is?" she asked skeptically.

"Mm hm," he said with a nod.

"Excuse me for being blunt, but what happened to the whole trying to move on, it hurt just seeing me, the whole depressed thing you were doing earlier?"

James shrugged nonchalantly, plopping down in a seat opposite Lily. "I've changed my mind about that."

"You've changed your mind," she repeated slowly, confused.

He nodded. "Yup."

"Why...?"

"I realized I didn't really have anything to mope over."

Lily bit the inside of her bottom lip. That stung, although she wasn't quite sure why she was offended by it so much. This was what she wanted…right?

"You see," began James' explanation, leaning causally back in his armchair. "It's not like I can't still talk to you."

"That's what I was saying earlier!"

"Exactly. So there is still hope for us, and there is still hope for _us._"

"James," she said in a scolding tone.  
"What?"

"You promised you weren't going to ask me out anymore, when you took me on the date…"

"Yeah, I changed my mind about that too…"

Lily stared, slightly agape, at the boy across from her, dumbfounded. "You- you can't just change your mind! You said- you promised- the bet…!"

"I believe," said James, leaning forward, resting his elbows on his knees, "If you recall the exact terms of our bet, as pointed out by my dear friend Moony, bless him, that I swore never to ask you out ever again if, and only if, you didn't fall for me. And if I am to believe your little, shall we call it a confession, from earlier, you have fallen…for me."

Lily opened her mouth to protest, but his logic was flawless, and that scared her just a little bit.

"Now, I assumed that you would immediately want to be my girlfriend, if or when you had fallen for me, but you are much too complicated for that. So, in conclusion, you have fallen for me, meaning I can ask you out as much as I want for the rest of the school year."

"…oh…"

"Or," he said, leaning further forward, his tone more serious, more sincere, the tone Lily had fallen in love with on their date. "We can just skip all that hassle and, you know, cut to the chase."

She had nothing to say. She couldn't understand why she wasn't disappointed that she was bested by a mere technicality. There were a lot of things she couldn't understand at the moment. Like why she was so uncomfortable under the look James had on her. Or why she was feeling this weird tingling throughout her body.

"Did you mean it?" she asked suddenly, much to James own confusion.

"What? Mean what?"

"Everything. Everything you said to me last weekend, was it all real…?"

"Every word."

"And when you told me you loved me…?"

"It's true. I do love you."

"What does it feel like?" she asked quietly, her eyes evading his, staring at her hands in her lap. "Love?"

"It's hard to put in words."

"Does it…does it feel like torture, because you know you will never be good enough? Does it feel like the greatest victory, the highest elation?"

"Yeah."

"Does it make you wanna laugh? Wanna cry? Wanna scream? Wanna sing? Does it make you want to dance and run away at the same time? Does it make you feel like you can become a better person, but also completely happy with the person you are?"

"That exactly what it is like," James answered in a soft whisper.

Lily gulped uneasily, still avoiding James' eyes, an even stronger tremor coming in her voice. "So is it how I'm feeling right now?"

James eyes widened. 'She loves me,' he thought. 'She just told me she loves me…than why is she crying?'

He was by her chair in an instant, kneeling next to her. "Lily," he said softly, tilting her chin up with the tips on his fingers under her chin. "Why are you crying?"

"I honestly don't know," she replied hoarsely, silent tears continuing to roll down her face. She would usually be embarrassed over something like this, but she strangely wasn't. He lifted one hand and wiped a tear lightly off her cheek. She observed him, wide-eyed, in a way she never had before. He looked different this close to her, or maybe he looked different because all of her once misguided disdain and bias against him were, for the first time, no longer clogging her vision.

His fingers trailed behind her jawbone. He leaned in towards her and she couldn't help but do the same. Their lips met in the middle. It was a kiss, unlike their first one which was swiftly parted. It was chaste, it was innocent, but it was filled with more passion, more honest, invigorating…oh, there was no word for it. It was right. It wasn't greedy or lustful or shallow. It was compassion, it was hope, it was kindness, it was understanding; in short, it was love.

* * *

Aki- Hey, don't be mad, I got you this chapter early than usual. But you know what is amazing about fanfiction. We all come from different places throughout the world. Different backgrounds, differebnt nationalities, races, ethnicities, religions, and yet thier is something we hold in common. None of you like cliffhangers and even tend to get violent over them, if my reviews for the last chapter are any indication... 


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

"Lily…"

The first sound after a silent moment. They sat next to each other on the couch, only seconds after their first real kiss.

"James," she said, looking up to meet his inquisitive eyes. "I…."

He held up his hand to her lips to stop her. "I know. You don't have to say anything."

"But I want to say it."

"…okay…"

"I…" she paused and tucked an offending strand of hair behind her ear, "I…can't believe I never realized it before. Even though you were always there…"

"Never what?"

"It's ridiculous really. That it took me this long to figure it out."

"Figure what out?" James asked, slightly confused by Lily's rambling and swiftly becoming curious.

"To figure out that….that I've been falling in love with you since the moment I met you." There was something about Lily's tone of voice as she said that. It wasn't meant to be elaborate, romantic, or superficial words. Her voice was low, as if she was speaking to herself and not to James, it was hoarse from crying, and it was so bitter, yet beautifully honest. Maybe the most so because Lily was speaking as if everything she said was a surprise to her too.

"I guess, even through every little thing I got furious with you about, I've always admired you."

James said nothing. He hadn't expected this. Honestly, he believed Lily _did_ have a right to hate him for some of the things he did. How he treated others at times. But only in his more recent maturity has he been able to look back on his years at Hogwarts and admit that.

"You're loyal to your friends, even to a fault."

"What do you mean?" he asked.

Lily gave a one shouldered shrug. "You cover for them sometimes. Get in trouble for them. Help them get away with stupid junk they do when they deserve to be caught and punished for it. I don't think I would do that…"

"I think you would," James replied softly. "If the moment came, I think you would step up for them."

"Really?" Lily asked, a hopeful note in her voice.

"Yeah. I just think that_ you_ think you wouldn't."

"That sentence doesn't make much sense."

"Well…" James shrugged playfully.

"You're clever too. I like that. In more than just an academic way; although, I mean academically too. It doesn't even look like you have to study, which I despise you for, just so you know."

"Oh, I swear, I do study…sometimes."

"Speaking of cleverness, how did you get into the girl's dormitory?"

James paused before answering simply.

"On a broomstick."

"A broomstick," repeated Lily, a little amazed at how typical that sounded for James Potter, the decorated Gryffindor Chaser.

"Can just fly over the steps whether they turn into a slide or not."

"See, that's what I'm talking about. It's so simple, yet it's so smart at the same time. Who would have thought of that? It's just like your pranks." Lily paused and paled at her lazy comment.

James observed her deviously. "What about my pranks?" he asked with a smirk. "That you, my biggest, what's a good word, critic…objector over them has praise for my lowly pranks…"

"I'm just saying that despite how immature, reckless, and rude they tend to be they seem to be very… well thought out…"

James' smirk widened. "That was torture for you to admit that, wasn't it?"

Lily nodded, "Very much."

James chuckled.

"You're funny," said Lily, "That's another quality about you I've always liked. But- 'funny' doesn't sound like the right word. Neither does 'light-hearted' or 'care-free,' they seem too innocent and 'happy' is too overused and bland. You know how to enjoy life. That's the only way I can figure to say it. You appreciate every moment and try to make it worth it. It's so obvious that I would fall in love with you when I admire who you are so much."

"Don't you realize that's why I fell in love with you?" said James suddenly, as Lily stopped speaking. "I admire you too."

"I'm not that admirable," she said, but James interrupted.

"Yes, you are. I've had a lot of things going for me in my life. I've had my family behind me, a family with money, and a name, and have been in this magical world my whole life. You've worked for everything you've gotten. You earned it. Your brains, your reputation, your influence, your…everything."

"That's not too big of a deal…everyone has to work for something in life."

"And do you not think you are loyal to your friends and they are loyal to you," continued James, ignoring Lily's last comment. "They care so much about you. Over this last week or so with everything that has been going on between me and you, think for a moment…have they ever left your side?"

Lily contemplated for a second. She shook her head. "No, they haven't."

"It takes someone special to garner that much respect."

"I guess so."

"And most of all, I love you because you know who you are. Who you are, what you are, who you want to be and where you want to go. That's taking so much more out of your life than what my foolish antics have done. I'm so confused sometimes. Sure, I'm having a great time in school and I have great friends and I have a place to fill, but what's going to happen when I go into the real world? Who am I going to be then? I get really worked up over this, I have for a while now, but ever since last week. Ever since our date…I've known."

"Known?" questioned Lily after James paused for a moment. "What did you know?"

"I've known," said James slowly, choosing each word deliberately, "That even if I am never with you, even if you never choose me, I want to be the kind of man that deserves to be with someone as wonderful as you."

"I'm not that wonderful."

"Yes, you are," replied James in a whisper before wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her in for anther kiss. It was deeper than before, more full, more passion-filled. No longer tentative or nervous. They had just admitted everything they had left to hide. Now, they both wanted to be with the person sitting opposite them, with the person they admired the most. So that, one day, maybe, they could be a little bit more like them.

Some part of Lily couldn't believe this was happening, but she distinctly felt James hands on her back, their bodies close together, his mouth on hers. She distinctly felt that she could stay like this forever and ever. She felt perfectly safe, perfectly happy, perfectly…in the right place. That they had been doing this all along. Suddenly Lily was very glad she was sitting down for she was sure if she were standing her legs would have collapsed right under her. Without a thought, she let one of her hands go through James' hair, his completely unruly hair. The hair she hated as he ruffled it cockily many a day. He had very nice hair.

James didn't know what to think anymore. Here he was kissing Lily, and not for the first time. There was a piece of him shocked that Lily hadn't pushed him away and told him it was a big mistake yet. I mean, nothing against her, but that just seemed to be his luck lately. Another part of him wasn't shocked at all. This was right, for the first he absolutely knew he hadn't made a mistake in all of this. He never doubted Lily's greatness, no, just his. And whether they actually would perfect together, or if he would be perfect enough for her. It seemed he was.

Someone, or someones, cleared their thoughts behind them. Lily and James instantly broke apart. The glanced over the back of the couch to see Sirius, Remus, Peter, Miranda, and Kaila standing in the common room, several with smug looks on their faces. Lily bit her lips to try and hold back her blush.

"Saw it yourself, Black. Hand it over," said Kaila triumphantly.

Sirius growled in frustration, before digging into his pockets to pull out several galleons.

"What a minute?" said James in sudden realization, "Did you bet against me, Padfoot?"

"It was nothing personal, mate, I was just playing the odds," said Sirius defensively.

"Don't worry about it, James," said Remus, "It wasn't a bet against you and Lily all together, just that you wouldn't be making out when we got back from dinner."

"So you were in on this too, Moony?" exclaimed James

* * *

Aki- Did you think it was over last chapter? Several of you did. Even more of you threatened me if it was. Anyway, it still is not over, I have one more chapter planned, although it is more of an epilogue. I want to thanks all of the reviewers and readers, I honestly did not expect this much of an overwhelming response. I also want to thanks my beta, sweetsouthrngal, who started about six chapters in (although she fixed most of the mistakes in those chapters too) because if she wasn't here you have to be reading mispellings, tyupos, and grammtical errors because I am a horrible proofreader. 


	17. Epilogue

**Warning-** Um, well this is the end. Lily acts really girlly in the beginning, which is different for her. Thier is some unneceesay fluff in their. This was hrad to write so it may seemed forced at times, but I like the end.

**Epilogue**

"I look horrible!"

"No, no you don't," replied Kaila wearily.

"Yes, I do," retorted Lily. "My atrocious hair is frizzy, my face is splotchy, nothing looks good on me…"

"First off all, you hair is gorgeous and it isn't frizzy, it's wavy. You're face isn't splotchy, they're called freckles and they are adorable. Thirdly, _everything _looks good on you."

"And fourthly," added Miranda, coming in the door and already observing what was happening, "James didn't fall in love with how you look, he fell in love with you."

"Ahh, you guys are so nice," said Lily softly, breaking out of her panicked state for just a moment. "But that doesn't change the fact I have nothing to wear." And now she's right back.

"Wear that green number you have," suggested Kaila.

"Really?" asked Lily, pulling the fancy shirt out of her closet and holding it up to herself. "I don't green is really my color."

"Darling, green is so your color."

"It brings out your eyes," added Miranda.

"If you say so…"

"We say so," replied Miranda and Kaila simultaneously. Lily pulled the shirt on and busied herself in front of the mirror.

"Why is tonight such a big deal again?" asked Miranda in a whisper to Kaila and she sat down next to her.

"Three month anniversary."

"Didn't they just have an anniversary like a few weeks ago?"

"That was the two month anniversary of their first kiss. This is the three month anniversary of their first date."

"Oh….well that's stupid."

"Don't tell her that," replied Kaila, nodding her head towards the frantic Lily.

…

Lily looked great as she descended the stares to the common room, James staring up at her. The sides of her wavy red hair was pulled back off her face, the rest falling far down her back. Her shirt was a marble green that matched her eyes, with a plunging neckline, flowy sleeves, and fit that showed off her figure. She smiled tentatively at her boyfriend, he beamed back.

"You look amazing," he whispered into her ear as she met him at the bottom of the steps.

"You don't look to shabby yourself," she replied with a grin. Totally caught up in each other, the couple exited Gryffindor Tower, unaware of their friends' stares and whispers.

"I don't think I've ever seen James that happy," commented Remus to Sirius.

"The same goes for Lily," said a voice from behind them. It was Kaila, Miranda by her side.

"How long do you think they will go?" asked Miranda, nodding her head toward the portrait hole which James and Lily had disappeared through.

"Them? Oh, they're going all the way," answered Sirius.

Kaila raised an eyebrow. "I thought you doubted?"

"I did a bit, until I saw them together. They deserve each other."

"They deserve to be happy," added Remus.

Kaila and Miranda both nodded in agreement.

"I guess they have the kind of romance that every girl wishes to have someday," said Miranda, sitting down on a couch.

"They have the kind of romance," added Sirius, "That makes you believe the world can't be all bad…"

…

"Think they're talking about us?" asked Lily casually as her and James wondered about the almost empty castle.

"Of course, I mean, who won't?" replied James in mock vainness. "We _are_ pretty amazing."

"Well, _I_ am, but I'm not quite sure about you yet," retorted Lily with a playful smirk.

"You hurt me!"

"Anything to deflate that head," Lily teased, ruffling her boyfriend's hair.

He glared at her, but was not actually angry.

"So where are we going?" asked Lily after a moment.

"It's a surprise."

"I think our relationship has had enough surprises so far to last the rest of our lives," pouted Lily.

"Good point," observed James. "So I tell you we are going to watch the sunset."

"Like on our first date?" questioned Lily keenly.

"Exactly," James replied.

"How unoriginal," Lily teased with a fake yawn.

"Oh, you know you love it," retorted James cheekily as he offered a hand to lead Lily up the tower steps to the balcony they shared the sunset together three months ago.

They walked in silence, reveling in how safe they felt in each other's company, how content they were holding each others' hands.

Lily gasped when she reached the balcony.

"What?" asked James casually, unable to hide his triumphant smile.

"It's…beautiful."

"It's just a little something I like to call a picnic," said James, leading Lily over to a red and gold blanket lain on the stone floor, which had a small simple meal laid out on it, including a candle and flower for ambiance.

"This view is beautiful too," whispered Lily, looking over the edge of the balcony. "I was so wrapped up in trying to not like you last time we were here that I didn't really appreciate it."

"It is amazing isn't it?"

"I know, you can see on forever."

"That's not what I was talking about."

"What were you talking about?" asked Lily, breaking her eyes away from the horizon to look at James.

"I was talking about how much had changed since we were up here last."

"Like the fact that I am in presence willingly?" suggested Lily as an example, a joke in her voice, but seriousness in her eyes.

"That and other things that you admitted to that you wouldn't have admitted to _four_ months ago."

"I know exactly what you mean. I've thought about it myself some….Some meaning a lot."

"What exactly?" asked James.

"It just amazes me how much changed in twenty-four hours. At the beginning I could hardly stand to be in your company. I had convinced myself to despise you…but by the end of the day I was fighting with myself over how strongly I felt about you."

"You can learn a whole lot about someone in a single day," agreed James. "Enough to change your perspective on the world, on life."

"What did you learn?" asked Lily curiously. "You liked me from the start."

"Yes, I liked you, but I— I guess I didn't know how much. I flirted with the idea of love, but after I really spent time with you I— I really knew what love was."

"See, twenty-four _has_ changed so much. It changed how we feel about each other. It's changed how we thought about probably a million things. For you-it's love, for me, knowing that you _know_ who someone is until you take the chance. That day could have changed the rest of our lives. Heck, it could even change the world."

James chuckled.

"What?" asked Lily, almost indignantly.

"That's just a little dramatic, isn't it?Change the world."

"Watch it buddy," said Lily, pointing a threatening finger at him. "You just wait until something we do changes the world and I will point and laugh and tell you 'I told you so.'… Stop laughing!"

James stopped, but couldn't hide his smile. "Whatever you say, Lily."

"Don't patronize me, James Potter," she replied in a small voice, her resolve weakening under her boyfriend's intense gaze.

Pulling his girlfriend closer to himself, James rested his chin on top of Lily's head.

"I should thank Remus and Sirius for giving me the whole 'one day' idea," James mumbled.

Lily turned her head slightly so she was able to look up at him. "Do you really want to talk about Remus and Sirius right now?"

"No," said James, taking the chance to kiss her.

…

Although Lily hadn't meant it seriously, although James thought it too dramatic, and although it had become a joke… the changes made in twenty-four hours not only altered two people's lives, it changed, no, saved the world.

* * *

Aki- OKay, that is the end. I want to thank all of my readers, my reviewers, and my wonderful beta, sweetsouthrngal. I don't know when I will write my next HP story, but I have acouple oneshot ideas so keep your eyes open for those. 


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